


Glam 100 drabbles

by ArianneMaya



Series: Glam-100 Drabbles [1]
Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-10-26
Updated: 2014-10-26
Packaged: 2017-10-24 23:56:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 63
Words: 33,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/269339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArianneMaya/pseuds/ArianneMaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a compilation of drabbles from <a href="http://glam-100.livejournal.com">glam-100</a> on livejournal.</p><p>Current drabble:<br/>Prompt #002: Playing with fire<br/><a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/269339/chapters/5587481">First Time</a><br/>Adam/Rufus Taylor<br/>Content(s)/Warning(s): None</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Silence (Cam, G)

**Author's Note:**

> Pairing/characters: Cam
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #001: On the bus(no sex). Thanks to Minxie for the preread.

Silence. Just the noise from the bus to break it. No music: Cam’s iPod disappeared sometime between the soundcheck and the show. This night is teasing her. All she can do is toss and turn. She hums under her breath, songs that she gets to play every night, music she knows by heart by now.  
   
Her fingers start counting a rhythm on her pillow. It changes, and the song becomes something else. Cam’s eyes open wide. Nothing to see, just the bunk on top of hers, yet she hears it. New music.  
   
A smile. She needs to talk to Leisha.


	2. I'll never be the same (Cam/Sasha, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Cam/Sasha
> 
> Content/warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #002: Playing with fire. Thanks to Minxie for the preread.

They both know it’s a bad idea.  
   
Hooking up with anyone on the tour is the perfect recipe for disaster. They’re all stuck with one another, in buses that feel more like tin cans with every second that passes. Right now it’s good, as if they were a band of teenagers on a road trip, still able to enjoy this because of the adrenaline high every night. Being on stage, then dancing the night away and doing it every single day.  
   
Besides, they both have girlfriends in LA. People waiting for them, expecting things from them. Real life. Responsibilities. Love.  
   
***  
   
And yet they do it every time. They know they shouldn’t. It never stops them. As the night goes on, as the alcohol flows in their veins along with the beat, they forget there is a real life, outside of this dream they’re all living. All they do is dance, and if they let their hands wander, near enough that they can feel the other’s heat better than their own, no one says a word.  
   
First time it happened, it was in a bar in the middle of nowhere, Sasha grabbing Cam’s hand and pulling her to the dance floor.  
   
***  
   
Last time it happens, they don’t dance. They’re in Amsterdam, high on music and pot. Laughing at the boys antics, their eyes catch each other, and this time they don’t let go. Cam keeps playing, Sasha is still sucking on her joint, but something changed. It’s heavy in the air, sticking to their lips, clinging to their skin as Adam belts out the last few notes of Whole Lotta Love.  
   
As the song ends and they walk offstage, Cam’s breath catches in her throat at the look in Sasha’s eyes. Everyone walks by them, but they stay there. Together. Alone.  
   
***  
   
It starts and it ends with a kiss.  
   
Instead of joining the others, they find a little private corner, somewhere. No one will interrupt them. Just this once, they let themselves look, touch. Pale skin against darker one, hands exploring, little sighs swallowed by kisses. Nothing but this moment, this woman. A few minutes stolen from life, the kind you hide, even from yourself, in the warmth of the sun. Their only word is each other’s name as they come. Both losing a bit of their heart in the process.  
   
They played with fire, and then ended up being burned.


	3. Tweet Temptations (Adam/Tommy/Sauli, NC-17)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, this is what my brain came up with when faced with this prompt and the tweet shenanigans of the night when Adam asked what, exactly, was shipping. Add to the mix the ongoing convos on my feed while it was happening, and this bunny was born.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Tommy/Sauli
> 
> Content/Warning: Porn
> 
> Written for prompt #004: Puppet master. Thanks to Leela for the preread.

Fingers slide through Tommy’s hair, holding his head back and pulling him off. Sauli’s cock slips out of Tommy’s mouth. His hand caresses Tommy’s cheek as he looks down with a loving smile. Just as Tommy is about to ask why the fuck they are stopping now, Adam’s larger body slides behind him, his cock nudging Tommy’s ass.  
   
Of course. They stopped because Adam said so. In these moments he feels like a puppet in their hands, being pulled along by his strings.  
   
Adam’s tongue  plays with his piercings. Tommy closes his eyes and his head lolls on Adam’s shoulder.  
   
***  
   
Tommy feels Sauli sliding off the bed, getting on his knees in front of him, then a hand closes around his cock. Needing more, Tommy rocks his hips forward, but he can’t get anywhere. Sauli isn’t moving, and Adam’s hands grab his hips, stopping him.  
   
His eyes open. He’s frustrated, knowing they just had another silent conversation over his shoulder. Both hold him into place.  
   
“I’m gonna need some back-up here.”  
   
Tommy shakes himself, trying to remember what they were talking about before, what the fuck Adam is talking about. A cell is shoved into his hand. Oh, that. Shit.  
   
***  
   
Moments later, he is lying down on his stomach on the bed, quickly looking through Adam’s tweets. This is so not fucking fair.  
   
They all agreed that the crazy fans need to be put on a leash, and that this was the best way. But how is he supposed to gather enough brainpower for it with Sauli kissing his way down his back? Tommy spread his legs farther, waiting for him to finally get to it, when Adam says, “He’s not doing anything.”  
   
The kisses stop, and only Sauli’s hand, a feather-light touch, keeps sliding up and down his back.  
   
***  
   
Not fucking fair. Quickly as he can, Tommy re-tweets one of Adam’s tweets about stopping fighting, before sliding his hands along Adam’s thighs. Adam is sitting in front of him, back to the wall, his cock just a few inches from Tommy’s face. Tommy’ mouth waters at the sight of it. If he could only…  
   
The cell is wrestled out of his hand, and Sauli’s hands slide into his hair again, yanking, holding his head back. “Not good enough.”  
   
Sauli is still smiling at him, but Tommy could scream with how frustrated he is now. Can they stop teasing him?  
   
***  
   
When Tommy looks at that fucking phone again, he sees Adam’s new tweet in his replies. He wants to be done with this brilliant idea and get back to fucking.  
   
He fires off a couple more tweets, makes a mistake, tries to correct himself. That should help things along.  
   
“Done. You guys happy?”  
   
 Adam’s eyes are still on his phone. Sauli’s hands slide up and down Tommy’s back, just enough to tease.  
   
“It’s a start.” Adam says, crooking a finger. “Come here, baby.”  
   
Tommy gets back on his knees and presses himself against Adam, their cocks sliding together. Sauli follows him, his lubed fingers playing around Tommy’s hole.   
   
***  
   
Adam’s attention is still on his phone.  
   
“Ah, come on, are you done with that?” Just as Tommy asks, Sauli presses his fingers into him. Tommy lets his eyes close again.  
   
“Let’s see if he can ignore us now,” Sauli murmurs into his ear. Tommy smiles. He likes that plan.  
   
This time there’s no one to stop his hips from following the rhythm of Sauli’s fingers. Tommy lets his body fall back. Sauli’s hand glides over his stomach. His fingers draw circles on Tommy’s belly, dipping every now and then but never quite touching his cock. Teasing him once more.  
   
***  
   
Just as Sauli’s hand is about to close around his cock with Sauli’s fingers deep in Tommy’s ass, crooking just a little, everything stops. Fingers are still there but not moving. Sauli’s hand is now digging into his hips, and Tommy can’t move. Again.  
   
“What the fuck?”  
   
He opens his eyes to see Adam holding out his cell.  
   
“They have a point.”  
   
A quick look shows him his own replies, full of messages telling him to man up, say things like they are.  
   
“Can we forget about that?”  
   
Adam shakes his head.  
   
***  
   
Sauli still hasn’t moved, making it hard for Tommy to pull out enough brain cells for that last tweet.  
   
“What do you want me to say?”  
   
Instead of Adam, it’s Sauli who answers. “Whatever you need to say so they’ll leave the both of you alone.”  
   
Last tweet.  
   
 _Sauli Is my bud and I LOVE that they are together! Adam is like a brother to me! @adamlambert Let’s start playing these tunes already!!! :)_  
   
“There. Happy?”  
   
He waits. Then it happens. Sauli crooks his fingers inside of Tommy as his hand closes around Tommy’s cock. Tommy whimpers, eyes closing again.  
   
***  
   
Adam finally lets go of his phone to join them just as Sauli grabs a condom. Tommy lets Sauli’s hand on his back push him against the bed. Adam’s hand grabs him under the chin, pulling his head up. Adam’s cock, forgotten while he was tweeting, is now fully hard, leaking precome. Tommy pushes his head forward and licks at the head.  
   
“Well done, baby.”  
   
He takes the praise for what it is, and opens his mouth when Adam’s fingers slide over it. Adam feeds Tommy his cock just as Sauli finally enters him, and he can’t do anything anymore.  
   
***  
   
He loses himself between them, the movement of Sauli’s cock filling his ass and Adam’s sliding down his throat.  
   
In those moments he knows he’s a puppet between them, when nothing exists but their cocks filling him, remembering that this is where they all belong. Together.  
   
Tommy keens around Adam’s cock as Sauli’s rhythm becomes erratic, nailing his prostate on each thrust. A hand closes around his cock, pulling him closer and closer to his orgasm. His head is pulled a little more and Adam drives deeper in his throat.  
   
They keep pulling on his strings. And he loves it.


	4. Siren's Call (Adam/Sauli, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli
> 
> Content/warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #005: Vampires. Thanks to Leela for the preread.

Adam’s about to leave the club when the pull sets its hooks in him.  
   
He doesn’t know how he missed it earlier. It’s so intense, he can nearly taste it. Sweat and joy and a pull so strong he can’t get away from it. He turns around, trying to figure out who’s calling to him. Then he sees a small, blond form shining in the low light. Blood pumping under skin.  
   
He goes to him, taps on his shoulder. Knowing blue eyes meet his. There’s no way Adam could resist.  
   
The siren’s call of the blood of an older vampire.


	5. Scars So Deep (Adam/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: References to prior non-con, violence
> 
> Written for prompt #006: You'd be calling out my name. Thanks to Leela for the beta and encouragement.

Tommy slips his shirt over his head and walks over to the window.  
   
“I’ve seen your tats before, Tommy.” Adam’s voice comes to him from over his shoulder, but Tommy doesn’t dare turn around. His palms go up against the glass. “Look closer.”  
   
He hears Adam walk over, needs to close his eyes and take a deep breath so he doesn’t run away. This is way too familiar, and it never ends well.  
   
Adam’s hands on his back follow the line of the tats. The job is so well done no one ever notices the scars until they touch them.  
   
***  
   
No one ever sees Tommy’s scars. They’re the reason why he’s always so careful, why even at home, he never walks around shirtless.  
   
After his loss of control tonight, he felt like he didn’t have a choice. Changing in the middle of a crowded place is never a good thing. Attacking someone is even worse.  
   
All Tommy can hope is that Adam will listen. Since Adam’s not his alpha, he can’t order him around, but it also means that Tommy’s still an outsider. Adam will always think of his family, first and foremost, no matter what he feels toward Tommy.   
   
***  
   
Claws marks. All over Tommy’s back, his shoulders. Deep lines hidden by tattoos, artwork that he chose over the years, reclaiming his own skin. He’s still not comfortable with anyone touching him.  
   
The only mark that’s invisible is the bite mark on his neck, which healed as soon as the bond was broken. Nothing can make the scars go away.  
   
Adam’s hands stop at the small of his back. Tommy curls up his hands, nails biting into his palms. Anything to stop himself shaking Adam’s hands off, pushing away from him and hiding.  
   
“What the fuck happened to you tonight?”  
   
 ***  
   
Eyes still closed, Tommy starts shaking. No. Not now. Not like this. He fights to keep control of himself, find himself again. Adam takes a step back, his hands now barely touching Tommy’s skin. Tommy catches Adam before he can move away completely. No. He needs to do this.  
   
Tommy grabs Adam’s hand, holding it against his back. He forces himself to breathe through his panic. He can feel the heat of Adam’s palm seeping into his skin. Slowly, Tommy turns around, his hand still on Adam’s wrist.  
   
Adam is silent as he sees the scars scattered over Tommy’s chest.  
   
***  
   
“The Black and Red.” The words are barely out of Tommy’s mouth when he feels Adam’s hand clench on Tommy’s skin in anger. This time Tommy can’t stop himself, has to step away and cross his arms over his chest. He doesn’t make a move to put his shirt back on.  
   
When he opens his eyes, Adam’s looking at him. The anger is still written in the tight line of his lips, the set of his shoulders, but he’s not leaving.  
   
“I thought they left pureblood clans alone.” The words are spat out of Adam’s mouth. Tommy shakes his head.  
   
***  
   
“They don’t. They’re just more subtle than with bitten weres.” As he speaks, Tommy let his arms fall, and Adam steps forward. Tommy turns his head, showing off his neck. He hears the sharp intake of breath, sees the aborted movement of Adam’s other hand, stopping just short of the mark.  
   
“Go ahead.” Tommy steels himself when Adam’s hand ghosts over his neck. Nothing but smooth skin and, if you look at it under the moonlight, the shadow of a mark that isn’t there anymore.  
   
“Is this…” Adam doesn’t dare to ask.  
   
Tommy closes his eyes. “A broken bond mark.”  
   
***  
   
“How can they even break a bond?”  
   
Tommy knows it’s not really a question, but the answer is out of his mouth before he can stop himself. The vibes coming from Adam are always way too strong for him to resist. “By driving one bondmate mad. After that, it’s easy.”  
   
Easy. To push someone so out of control that even the wolf doesn’t recognize their mate. That they will lash out at whoever’s nearest to them, and be driven by instincts so deeply wrong that the wolf hides inside, not wanting to come out. If it does, things turn ugly.  
   
***  
   
Tommy knows that in a way, he was lucky. He’s still sane, still alive. Except he still feels that there are parts of him that can never be fixed. Like the ones that so desperately want to cling to Adam, just because he feels like Simon did. The vibes are the same, the instinct to protect, to keep safe.  
   
Adam’s hand move from his neck to his chest, still following his scars in a caress that is oddly comforting.  
   
“You want to tell me?”  
   
Tommy shakes his head. He can’t. Not yet. He just wanted Adam to understand a little.  
   
***  
   
“Who was she?”  
   
A little smile graces Tommy’s lips at Adam’s question. “He”, Tommy corrects without even thinking about it. “That’s why it went so wrong.”  
   
It shouldn’t have happened. That’s what everyone thought, even if they didn’t say it aloud. The first bond was to keep the bloodlines going. Between two males, it wasn’t possible. Or it shouldn’t have been.  
   
Tommy swallows once, trying to get rid of the dryness in his throat. He lets Adam pulls him toward the couch, aware that it’s still only Adam’s hand touching him. Tommy curls up in a corner. Near yet far.  
   
***  
   
Tommy knows Adam is still looking at him, at the scars he always keeps hidden. “What happened tonight?” The same question again, the one Tommy doesn’t want to answer. Once more, his nails dig little crescents into his palms. As long as he can say it’s the Black and Red, he can forget.  
   
He can convince himself he’s safe, that he can open himself up again. He can believe this thing between them can go somewhere, and that Tommy isn’t always going to start shaking like a leaf at the idea of being touched. He wants to forget and live.  
   
***  
   
It’s not going to happen. Not with the way Adam’s looking at him, waiting for an answer, like he knows that Tommy’s not telling the whole truth. Tommy looks down at the floor. He feels better than he did earlier. The last thing he wants is to lose himself again, to be so out of control that he forgets who, what, he is.  
   
He also knows that Adam’s not going to let this go. While Adam cares about him, he’s responsible for his clan. No matter what most born weres believe, bitten weres are just as protective, just as loyal.  
   
***  
   
Since Tommy attacked Allison earlier, there’s no way Adam can just let it go without being sure that Tommy isn’t going to lose control again. That’s the problem. Tommy doesn’t know if he could stop it. There’s no way Adam missed how Terrance forced Tommy to change back.  
   
Tommy has no choice but to talk. It had to happen at some point. That’s why he started by showing Adam his scars. Partly in the hope that he’d be able to say as little as possible, but mostly so he could create this little space for himself, safe enough to speak.  
   
***  
   
The words get stuck in Tommy’s throat. He’s never said it out loud, not even once. Terrance knows just enough not to ask. That’s one of the reasons Tommy gave Terrance alpha powers over him. So that he had at least one person around him who would never push, but who could hold him back if he needed it.  
                 
Yet all it did was make what happened tonight even more complicated. Tommy knows the only reason Adam didn’t say anything was that Terrance saved Allison’s life. Tommy’s wolf wouldn’t have stopped, would’ve left his human side to deal with consequences.  
   
***  
   
Tommy’s still an outsider, still a born were who lost his family and isn’t ready to replace them with Adam’s clan. Tommy hadn’t thought about how it would look to Adam, the actual alpha. He just wanted to feel safe. He hadn’t thought about the hierarchy breach, or the fact that it could make Adam refuse Tommy later.  
   
“I need you to tell me. You know that, right?” Adam isn’t touching him any longer. The way Adam’s looking at him, Tommy knows that if he doesn’t explain, Adam’s not going to let him near any of his family, ever again.  
   
***  
   
Tommy doesn’t know what will hurt the most. Losing all of them, losing Adam, or having to give voice to his pain. He doesn’t want to lose that part of himself, either. Saying the words makes him feel like it’s happening all over again. He’s already tried.  
   
Tommy looks up at the window. The moon’s full tomorrow. He’s supposed to go running with Adam and his clan. Now he doesn’t know if it will happen. He wants to, but he knows that Adam won’t let him if he doesn’t explain.  
   
“Are you going to say something?” Adam’s losing his patience.  
   
***  
   
Deep breath. “I nearly went mad as well. They tried. In a way, I was the lucky one.” Tommy stops, closes his eyes again. He starts to shake, but he keeps going anyway.  
   
“They did such a number on Simon that he didn’t recognize me anymore. His wolf went berserk whenever I came close.”  
   
Adam’s hand slips toward his, and he links their fingers. Tommy lets him do it, blinking back the tears that want to fall.  
   
“It was the Black and Red’s fault. I didn’t lie about that. But it was Simon who attacked me.”  
   
Tommy’s voice breaks then.  
   
***  
   
Tommy tries, but the words get caught somewhere between his head and his mouth. He can’t say it. He slips his hand out of Adam’s grip and walks back toward the window, palms flat against the glass. He looks up at the moon.  
   
“Someone yelled his name in the bar tonight. That’s why I freaked out.”  
   
No way he can say anything more. The rest has to stay locked safely inside his head. How he called out Simon’s name, over and over, hoping it would make Simon stop.  
   
How he screamed until his voice gave out, until he blacked out.  
   
***  
   
Steps behind him. Tommy doesn’t dare look back, knowing that this is where it could end, that he could lose everything he’d built up over the last few weeks. He feels Adam’s heat at his back, and his hands try to close on themselves.  
   
Adam’s hand goes up against the bondmark, barely there. A butterfly touch.  
   
Tommy bends forward until his forehead is resting against the cool glass. He’s lost. He knows he can’t hope for much.  
   
“Run with us tomorrow night.” Adam’s voice, barely a whisper in Tommy’s ear. “We can work out the rest between the full moons.”


	6. <strike>Wrong</strike> Right Number (Tommy/?, NC-17)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Tommy/?
> 
> Content/Warning: Porn
> 
> Written for prompt #008: Texting/Tweeting. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

It’s past midnight when Tommy’s cell starts vibrating. It takes him a few minutes to figure out where the noise is coming from. So by the time he finds it, he already has three texts waiting.  
   
 _You home yet, baby?_  
   
 _Text me when you get there._  
   
 _Got a surprise for you ;)_  
   
He doesn’t recognize the number, but he’s sure it’s just a friend joking. Tommy texts back with a smirk. Whoever it is will be disappointed when he doesn’t bite the way they’re hoping he will.  
   
 _I’m home now… and waiting ;)_  
   
There. Now the joke is on them.  
   
***  
   
 _Good. You don’t have to text back. Just make sure you’re comfy._  
   
Tommy blinks, looking down at his phone. What does he do now? He checks the number once more, tries to remember if it’s familiar. Maybe… Yeah, someone’s playing him, can’t be anything else. The worst kind of joke.  
   
Without stopping to think about it, Tommy heads to his room. He’s lucky to have the place to himself tonight. He wasn’t sleeping, but he’s already down to his boxers and a t-shirt.  
   
He lies down on his bed before he texts back.  
   
 _I am now. You can go on._  
   
***  
   
 _Nice. Thought about you all evening, baby. The way you look, tight little body lying on my bed._  
   
At that, Tommy bursts out laughing. Someone’s fucking playing him. All of his friends took turns teasing him about the amount of bodybuilding he does to not look like a scrawny little thing.  
   
Well. At least it sounds like this will be fun.  
   
 _Bet you wish I was there. I do. I want to just walk in and find you on my bed, naked, waiting for me._  
   
The texts keep coming. Someone put way too much thought into this. Tommy’s smile disappears.  
   
***  
   
Tommy should just turn off his phone, get some sleep, and hunt down whoever it is tomorrow.  
   
He doesn’t. Instead, he keeps reading.  
   
 _Love seeing you like that, nice and hard for me, like you can’t wait to get your hands on me. But you know you can’t, don’t you? Your hands are by your sides. Waiting._  
   
 _Just looking at you until you start fidgeting, your cock getting harder each second. So gorgeous, baby._  
   
 _Maybe I should tie you up next time._  
   
Tommy’s breath shouldn’t catch when he reads that, his cock shouldn’t get hard. It does in a nano-second.  
   
***  
   
 _I’ll take pity on you, walk up to the bed, unzip and just feed you my cock, one inch at a time, until you can’t take more. Then I’ll slide down your throat. I want to feel it tightening around me, your eyes watering because it’s always a little too much, but we both know you’re not going to try and stop me._  
   
Since there’s no one else, Tommy can admit that he knew this was coming from the start. He’d expected to see that cock mentioned sooner, along with a “gotcha, sucker!” confirming that this is just a joke.  
   
***  
   
It’s not a joke, Tommy knows that now. Doesn’t make him turn off his phone, or send a text telling the other guy that he has the wrong number.  
   
Instead, his mind goes into overdrive as the idea of another guy’s cock down his throat makes his mouth water. One hand still holding the cell, he slips the other into his boxers and starts jerking his cock.  
   
 _You touching yourself now, baby? I know you are. Don’t make yourself come yet. We’re not done._  
   
Tommy doesn’t know why he listens, but he does. The hand on his cock slows down.  
   
***  
   
 _You have lube handy? I’ll wait._  
   
Tommy’s eyes boggle at that. Now would be the time to put a fucking end to this craziness. He should be freaking out, not enjoying himself. He has a pretty good idea of what’s coming next.  
   
All he does is grab the lube that he keeps in his bedside table and wait. Tommy doesn’t stop to wonder about the fact that, maybe, he wants what happens next.  
   
 _Take off your clothes if you haven’t already._  
   
Once again he obeys, boxers and tee ending up in a bundle on the floor. Then he just waits.  
   
***  
   
 _Turning you over now, pushing your head down on the pillow, your ass in the air. Spread your legs for me, baby._  
   
Tommy’s legs spread of their own accord, hand pulling on his cock. His movements are still slow, but he needs it so bad.  
   
 _Spreading your cheeks, just looking at you, your little hole twitching, begging for me to touch you, do something, anything._  
   
His breathing becomes faster, harsher.  
   
 _I blow on it. Nothing else, just sudden cold air. You try to get away, but you know I won’t let you. Then my tongue goes down on your hole._  
   
***  
   
 _Licking, sucking, relaxing you until I can get my tongue inside and fuck you with it, short licks all over your hole. Want to hear those sounds coming out of your mouth._  
   
Tommy’s hand grips the base of his cock, hard. He’s sure he’s not allowed to come yet. Wait, where did that thought came from?  
   
 _Grab the lube. Want you to do what I’m telling you._  
   
He does. At this point, he’s not even asking why. He just knows that he needs it.  
   
 _A finger joins my tongue, thrusting in and out, opening you up even more. So gorgeous._  
   
***  
   
There aren’t any more texts telling Tommy what to do. He doesn’t need them. He spreads his legs, digs his heels into the mattress. The hand that was on his cock moves lower, gliding over his balls to tease his own asshole.  
   
He closes his eyes as he teases himself, fingers spreading the lube around, until he slowly pushes a finger in, mimicking the images that the texts put in his head. He imagines somebody else, with bigger fingers, a larger body, another man looking down at him, making Tommy ready for his cock.  
   
 _I stop licking and stand back._  
   
***  
   
 _Two fingers now, thrusting in and out, searching for the right angle until you keen. I know I’ve found the right spot and keep on hitting it, dragging even more of those gorgeous sounds out of you._  
   
A second finger joins the first one. The little voice in Tommy’s mind telling him he shouldn’t be enjoying this shuts up when he hits a spot that makes him see stars. He keeps that angle, fucking himself on his own fingers.  
   
 _My fingers slip out. You’re pleading now, begging me to get them back in, to keep fucking you hard. I don’t._  
   
***  
   
Tommy’s eyes are glued to the phone, fingers pushing in and out of his hole, hips moving toward his hand. Even if he wanted to stop, he couldn’t.  
   
 _You’re still begging, trying to chase after my fingers. One hand is holding you down, and I’m lubing myself with the other, just barely. Want you to feel it._  
   
 _You’re so gorgeous like that, spread out on my bed, all shiny with saliva and lube, begging me to fuck you, to put my cock in you._  
   
 _When I push in, you make that surprised sound, you always do. You feel so good._  
   
***  
   
 _Are you close, baby?_  
   
Yeah. Tommy’s so fucking close he can taste it. He needs to come, fuck, he’s never wanted something so badly.  
   
 _I’m fucking you now, fast, long thrusts, pushing my cock in as far as it can go. I’m giving it to you the way you like it, as hard as I can._  
   
 _Want to see you come like that, just from my cock in your ass. I bat your hands away from your cock when you try to reach for it. We’re doing it my way, baby._  
   
Tommy makes a frustrated sound, his hips still moving.  
   
***  
   
Tommy wants… Christ, he fucking needs to come. His fingers are still thrusting in and out of his ass at a furious rhythm, but he doesn’t dare let go of his cell, and he doesn’t have another hand to reach for his cock.  
   
 _You’re always so beautiful when I’m pushing you that hard and you want nothing more than to come, right now. Not yet, baby. Love how frustrated you sound whenever I say that._  
   
Frustrated doesn’t even begin to cover it.  
   
 _Maybe I’ll let you touch yourself now. Or maybe not. I love that image of you, desperate, hard._  
   
***  
   
Fuck. Can the teasing stop now? Please?  
   
 _Want to hear you beg me, baby. Call me._  
   
Tommy doesn’t think before hitting the call button.  
   
“Fuck, please, please, please…” He’s babbling and whimpering, and he doesn’t even care.  
   
“Go ahead, baby, come for me.” A rich and smooth voice, honey sweet, with just a hint of authority.  
   
Tommy barely gets his hand off his ass and on his cock before he comes with a strangled cry.  
   
“Oh wow, that was…” He stops himself short.  
   
“Are you okay, baby? You sound weird.”  
   
Tommy’s never hung up a phone faster in his life.  
   
***  
   
The guy will never call back, and the next day Tommy saves those texts in his phone. He jerks off to those for years, until he auditions for Adam Lambert’s band.  
   
Maybe a week later, Adam calls him, suggesting a get-together with the band. Tommy saves his number, thinking that it somehow looks familiar but he shrugs it off. A friend probably had a similar one.  
   
Then the next time he opens up the saved texts, his eyes nearly bug out of his head. The texts he got from that stranger years ago are now identified with a name. Adam.


	7. Burying His Soul in a Scrapbook (Tommy, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Tommy
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #009: Scars. This is a little glimpse in the past of my werewolf AU. Many thanks to Leela for the beta and for the title idea, which come from a Leonard Cohen quote.

“This will hurt,” the tattoo artist warns as soon as he sees the crisscross of scars decorating Tommy’s back.

“I know.” Tommy shrugs. “I don’t care.”

Tommy settles on the chair, offering his back. The first few bites of the needle make him jump, then he doesn’t move anymore, welcoming each little feeling, the pain in his back that thrums at the same rhythm as his heartbeat. There’s only this moment, nothing else matters.

The outside world doesn’t exist anymore. Tommy’s deep into his own universe, where the only pain he can feel is the one he chose himself.

***

Tommy hears only the buzzing of the needle, the low humming of the tattoo artist, creating a reality where he can hide for a few moments. He loses himself in the noise, the sweet pain. Each bite of the needle into his skin reminding him that he’s alive. Each blot of ink on faded scars hiding bad memories as he reclaims his own skin.

He needed to do this, to turn the unwanted scars into a gorgeous work of art. Chasing the ghosts of his past away, even as he reminds himself that they will always be part of him.


	8. Keeping Time (Cam, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Cam
> 
> Content/Warnings: None.
> 
> Written for prompt #010: Time flies. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

There was a time when even music seemed to be failing them, leaving them by themselves, in the silence.

Now times flies in low humming, laughter, as they create this together. The smiles Leisha throws Cam’s way warm her to the core.

Nothing compares to the energy flowing their way, to the joy of performing their own songs after believing they couldn’t anymore. Time stopped when their label dropped them. Now it’s running again, along with music, in soft vibrations that caress Cam’s skin, moving all over her body.

She’s never felt more alive than she does on a stage.


	9. Tommy and the Very Cold, No Good Situation (Adam, Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam, Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #012: Picture prompt. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

Since Tommy’s alone, he can admit it : this is the stupidest, most ridiculous situation he has ever found himself in. Ever.

What sounds like a good idea when you’re drunk out of your mind? Most likely isn’t. But he’s forgotten that. Which is why he’s sitting ass-deep in the snow, pants around his ankles, junk shriveling from the cold. Stuck there because his so-called-friends ran away on him after taking that fucking picture. There’s no way he can stand up by himself with that thing in his ass.

He starts to reach for his cell phone, then stop himself.

***

Before Tommy retrieves his phone, he tries one last time to get up. No one will see him like this if he can help it. He moves the hand protecting his dick, puts both hands on the ground and pushes.

He only succeeds in falling again, screaming like a child when it feels like the icy dick is pushed even deeper into his ass. No, forget it. His head might be clear, but he’s drunk enough he doesn’t have the coordination to get himself off this thing without help. Which means he has to call someone.

His life really sucks.

***

Tommy thumbs through his contacts, dismissing every single one of them. What he needs is someone who isn’t going to laugh at him, or who’ll at least keep quiet. So that once he deletes the pictures from that traitor’s phone, the story of tonight’s humiliation won’t be all over school.

At least the cold sobered him enough that he has control of his brain again. He’s aware that most of the friends he could call in this kind of situation are the ones who put him there in the first place.

The one major exception is sleeping at this hour.

***

“Tommy?” Adam’s sleepy voice confirms that Tommy just woke him up, but Tommy doesn’t allow himself to feel guilty. He needs someone to get him out of this mess before he dies of hypothermia. Or before his dick falls off. “What’s happening?”

“I’m in trouble. Can you come and get me?”

Tommy’s aware asking like that makes him a shitty friend who will make Adam worry over nothing, but he needs Adam to get out of bed and get Tommy out of this mess. Right. The fuck. Now.

“Tommy, what the hell…”

“I’m okay, I just need a lift. Please?”

***

After that Tommy waits. He’s cold all over, wet, and is doing his very best not to think of that thing in his ass.

He hears a car slowing down, the engine stopping, then someone moving through the snow. Tommy catches himself right before he calls out Adam’s name. No way is anybody else seeing him like that.

“Tommy?” It’s Adam’s voice, thank fuck. Tommy looks at him and is welcomed by the sight of Adam trying his hardest not to laugh. “Did they just tie you up and ran away?”

Tommy shows him the hand not protecting his junk.

***

“No. But they still left me alone here. Can’t move.”

Adam’s gaze passes over him. “Are you still drunk?”

Tommy sighs, pushes himself up on one elbow after pointing somewhere behind him. “Look.”

He doesn’t dare look as Adam drops to his knees in the snow. Adam doesn’t even try to hold in the laughter when he sees the big, icy dick coming out of Tommy’s ass.

“How the fuck…” Adam can’t finish his sentence and just double over laughing.

“Fucker,” Tommy mumbles. “I was drunk, took a stupid dare, didn’t think my fucking friends would leave me like that.”

***

“Are you going to help me or not? My dick’s about to fall off.”

The only answer Tommy gets is Adam’s hands on his hips. Adam’s voice is still lit up with laughter as he says, “If you wanted something up your ass that bad, all you had to do was ask.”

Tommy sighs. Adam will never let him forget this. Never. “Are you done mocking me? Help me up, please?”

Adam grabs Tommy’s hips to help him stand again. They both nearly fall over, since Tommy’s still holding one hand over his junk to protect it from the cold.

***

“It would be easier if you’d just give me your hand. I’ve seen your dick before. I’m not going to molest you.”

Adam’s still laughing a bit, and while Tommy wants to hit him, he also doesn’t want Adam to leave him there. He moves his hand, and finally, Adam manages to pull him up and off. Tommy couldn’t pull his pants up faster if he was on fire.

When Adam finally stops laughing, it’s to say “You should know better by now.”

“Thanks, Mom,” Tommy replies.

“You could have just… moved, no?” Adam asks, looking over at the sculpture.

***

Tommy points to the sculpture. “No. It’s like ice.” He shivers, sure he’s never going to get warm again.

Adam grabs one of his hands. “Come on. Let’s get you home, and dry.”

Tommy lets Adam pulls him along toward his car. “My mother will freak out…”

“I know that. I’m taking you to my place. My parents won’t mind,” Adam says as they reach the car.

Tommy sinks into the car seat, turning the heat as high as he can. He curls in on himself, trying to find some warmth. He’s still shivering. He swears he’s never drinking again.

***

They stay silent for the whole ride. Shivers are still rippling all over Tommy’s skin, but some warmth is coming back to his limbs. At least.

Adam looks over at him.

Tommy doesn’t let Adam say a word. “I know. I owe you one big time.”

There’s nothing more to say. For Adam to get out of bed in the middle of the night when he has a school concert the next day is a big deal, they both know it.

Adam smiles at him, laughter dancing in his eyes. “Don’t worry. I’ll always be there to save your ass.”


	10. Naked Love (Brian/Terrance, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Terrance
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #035: I want your naked love. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

Nothing could have prepared Brian for this. Not the years of guarding the place, his music the only thing that could guide people inside. Not seeing dancers come and go, long limbs flowing with the music, an offering when the sun goes down, thanks when dawn arrives. Not everyone he’s seen coming here, hopeful, asking respectfully if he could find the door for them. Not seeing them walk out, stars in their eyes, and thank him.

It might be why he’s still playing here after so many years: it’s the only place where the color of his skin doesn’t matter.

***

It took him years to find the courage to enter.

Whenever people talk about it, they use hushed voices, likening it to a mythical place where only the pure, naked truth emerges. He knows that’s not true – everyone knows what the words Naked Love stand for – but he’s heard so much about how the place knows people, always partners them perfectly, that he was expecting… well, not this.

The person in front of him could be his type to a tee. Black, defined muscles of a dancer’s body, easy smile… Except for the fact that the person is decidedly male.

***

“Not as glamorous as you thought it would be?” There’s a laugh hidden in the dancer’s voice (the room whispers his name to Brian, _Terrance_ ), and Brian can’t help but smile in return.

“I thought the chamber would send me someone more…” Brian doesn’t finish his thought, trying to find a way to say it without being insulting.

“Female?” Terrance says it like it’s evidence. “Well, this place doesn’t exactly care what sex you’re attracted to.” As he says that, Terrance straightens to his full height, reminding Brian that Terrance’s very naked. Brian tries hard to focus on Terrance’s face.

***

Terrance walks toward Brian, his eyes shining a little, like he knows very well how he’s affecting Brian. “The room only cares about what’s in here,” Terrance raises a finger and points at Brian’s head, “and here,” then at Brian’s chest, right over his heart. “It doesn’t bother with pesky details like attraction. Sometimes, all you get is a night of conversation. Some of the best friendships are born that way.”

“Aren’t you…” Once more Brian doesn’t dare go further.

Terrance shrugs. “A dancer? Yes, I am. Not a synonym for prostitute, in case you were wondering.”

“I know that.”

***

Terrance raises an eyebrow. It’s clear he doesn’t believe a word that Brian just said. Brian sighs, trying to find a way to explain without digging himself into an even bigger hole. “I’m a musician. I understand what you mean.”

That makes Terrance smile and ask, “Is that why you’re here? You thought you had to?”

“No. I know enough to be aware that this place doesn’t let the unwilling enter.” As he says that, Brian remembers the nights when he was playing for someone at the door, watching as even his music tried and failed to guide them inside.

***

“Tell me then. Where do we go from here?” Terrance asks.

Brian thought he knew why he came there. Now he realizes that he had no idea. Suddenly, everything he had heard about the place makes a lot more sense. Naked Love. Pure truth.

When he doesn’t reply fast enough, Terrance says, “We’re stuck here until dawn. There’s a lot I could show you.” he takes another step toward Brian, stepping right into Brian’s personal space.

“What are you doing?” Brian asks as Terrance slips an arm around him and brings him closer. He only gets a smile in reply.

***

“The real question is: why aren’t you pushing me away?”

Brian realizes that Terrance has been trying to seduce him since the moment he entered the chamber. He can’t find it in himself to mind, though. Terrance presses closer, his cock hard against Brian’s thigh, and Brian’s own cock hardens. “Not even worried I was gonna punch you?”

Another easy smile. “No. You said it yourself. The room wouldn’t have sent you to me if you weren’t willing.”

“Why not?” he says, already breathless when Terrance kisses him. Ready to face the truth, Brian finally stops fighting his own desire.


	11. Forged in Flame (Adam/Sauli/Terrance, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli/Terrance
> 
> Content/Warnings: Werewolves
> 
> Written for prompt #043: Heat. Thanks to @aislinntlc for the preread.

This had been moved to [Forged in Flame](http://archiveofourown.org/works/732645/chapters/1361563), where I've reposted all the drabble-sets of this 'verse in chronological order and where I'll post any new drabble-sets that happen in the same 'verse.


	12. The Sweetest Mix (Adam/Sauli/Terrance, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli/Terrance
> 
> Contents/Warnings: Werewolves
> 
> Written for prompt #045: Scent. Thanks to Leela for the beta.
> 
> This happen in the same 'verse as, and a few months prior to "Forged in Flame"

This had been moved to [Forged in Flame](http://archiveofourown.org/works/732645/chapters/1361563), where I've reposted all the drabble-sets of this 'verse in chronological order and where I'll post any new drabble-sets that happen in the same 'verse.


	13. Finding their Own Way (Adam/Sauli/Terrance, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli/Terrance
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #046: Off Da Grid. Third story in my werewolf threesome 'verse, this happens a couple of weeks after [The Sweetest Mix](http://glam-100.livejournal.com/143009.html). Thanks to Leela for the beta.

This had been moved to [Forged in Flame](http://archiveofourown.org/works/732645/chapters/1361563), where I've reposted all the drabble-sets of this 'verse in chronological order and where I'll post any new drabble-sets that happen in the same 'verse.


	14. His Chosen Time (Adam/Sauli/Terrance, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli/Terrance
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #47: I can resist everything except temptation. Fourth story in my werewolf threesome 'verse, this is the day after [Forged in Flame](http://glam-100.livejournal.com/138524.html). Thanks to Leela for the beta.

This had been moved to [Forged in Flame](http://archiveofourown.org/works/732645/chapters/1361563), where I've reposted all the drabble-sets of this 'verse in chronological order and where I'll post any new drabble-sets that happen in the same 'verse.


	15. The Pain of Silence (Adam/?, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam/?
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #56: Communication Breakdown. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

By the time Adam realizes how far he’s gone, it’s already too late. 

He’d promised himself that he wouldn’t lose his heart. He’d honestly thought he could do casual, that whatever this is would stay quietly in a corner of his head.

Instead, his whole reality seems to be slipping through his fingers. His world’s been turned upside down and yet, he wants more. He needs more. 

The stolen moments they share don’t satisfy him. Being separated hurts but being together and having to pretend this isn’t happening is worse. 

He has to say something before the situation kills him.

***

The question’s been asked of him, time and time again. But the words stay stuck somewhere between Adam’s mind and his mouth. 

_I need you as my lover, my partner, my friend._

_I want everything. I need everything._

Saying that would put an end to their story. There’s no point in trying to ask for the only thing he knows he can’t have. 

He needs to free himself before he’s so broken that he can’t be healed. Yet he can’t help but think that losing this would hurt even more. 

So even though it’s ripping him apart, he stays silent.


	16. The Gift that Keeps on Giving (Adam/Sauli, R)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam/Sauli
> 
> Content/Warnings: None... well, maybe a little hint of powerplay ;)
> 
> Written for prompt #057: Candy Cock Ring. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

“Sauli, stop teasing.” The command turns into a squeak when Adam feels Sauli’s breath against his cock, then a hint of teeth when Sauli grabs a candy with his mouth and tugs it off the cord around Adam’s dick. 

Adam’s holding on the rope tying his hands to the bed as he tries his best to keep his orgasm at bay. It’s been building up in his lower back for fucking ever now, but both Sauli’s threat and promise are keeping Adam on the edge.

“I’m not teasing.” A hot puff of breath against Adam’s cock makes him cry out.

***

He closes his eyes against the sight that he knows will make him come even if he tries to stop himself. A sharp slap on his thigh makes him open them again.

“Watch.” The order has Adam eyes glued to Sauli as he traces a candy-colored pattern on Adam’s cock. With a wicked smile, Sauli grabs another candy with his teeth, giving Adam a tease of tongue at the same time. 

“Sauli…”

“I’m not teasing,” Sauli says, mouthing the skin of Adam’s balls. “I’m enjoying my gift.”

Adam groans. He’s gonna kill Tommy for giving Sauli that candy cock-ring box.


	17. Not So Scary (Brian/Tommy, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #058: Scary Monsters and Super Freaks. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

“You’re supposed to be dressed up as… what, exactly?” Tommy asks.

Slowly, Brian turns away from the mirror he was using to do his make-up. “Isn’t it obvious?”

Tommy tilts his head, looks at Brian from head to toe. Brian’s wearing some of his everyday clothes, with a little more make-up, maybe. “No.”

“You really have no idea?” Brian stalks toward Tommy, making him take a step back until Tommy finds himself with his back to the wall.

Tommy’s breath catches in his throat when he gets it, but he forces himself to say, “All I see is a freak.”

***

Brian laughs as he steps into Tommy’s space, resting his hands on the wall on either side of Tommy’s head, caging him in.

“Still better than someone who dresses up as the exact same thing every year.” There’s a hint of mockery in Brian’s tone, just enough to raise Tommy’s hackles, to force him to react.

“Next time, at least put in fangs. As far as scary monsters go? You’re doing it wrong.”

The possessive splay of Brian’s fingers on the side of Tommy’s neck makes him shiver. “Just you wait until we’re back, Tommy. I’ll show you what’s scary.”


	18. Finding his Center (Adam/Brian, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: Hints of D/s
> 
> Written for prompt #59: hold on. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

It’s been too long. 

Too many days of expectations piling up on Adam. Too many nights spent in a bus full of people with next to no privacy. 

It’s been long enough that the little steps Brian always takes so that Adam has the space he needs to sit back and breathe don’t work anymore. Adam’s getting restless, snapping at everyone and anyone. 

The pressure he’s putting on himself isn’t helping, but he can’t stop. So much hangs in the balance of this tour that it has to be perfect. Adam can’t see past that, even if he wants to. 

***

That’s why he ends up alone on the bus in the middle of the afternoon. There’s another round of obligations coming up, interviews and meet and greet, sound check and tonight’s concert. But first, Adam needs to finds his center. 

He’s sitting on the ground in the space they use as a living room, head bowed on his raised knees, desperately trying to find some peace. 

He hears the door open and close as someone enters but doesn’t even look to see who it is. They’ll realize soon enough that the last thing Adam needs now is to be disturbed. 

***

He feels the person dropping onto the couch behind him, then strong hands working on the muscles of his shoulders. Adam sighs in relief when he understands that Brian decided to ignore him when he said that he wanted to be left alone. 

Tension slips out of Adam, little by little under the steady pressure of Brian’s hands. 

“They’re waiting for you,” Brian reminds him. 

Adam shakes his head. “I’m not sure I can. Not now.”

Adam’s relieved when Brian doesn’t argue. He lets himself hide in that little safe space where nothing exists but the two of them, together. 

***

“We have a hotel night tonight, remember?”

The comment takes Adam by surprise, enough that it’s a few seconds before he replies, “I completely forgot.”

“I didn’t,” Brian says, slow and careful. He lets go of Adam’s shoulders, leaving only one hand on the back of Adam’s neck. “I’m bringing you down tonight. All you need is to hold on until the end of the show. Think you can do that?”

Adam’s breath catches in his throat. He nods, the pressure of Brian’s hand on his neck feeling like a promise, finally allowing him to find the focus he needs.


	19. That Word (Adam, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #060: Diva. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

At the time, it was whispers and snickers behind his back. Because he was a theater kid. Because he enjoyed playing with costumes and make-up. 

It was meant to be an insult. One more thing to bring him down, to remind him that he didn’t fit in, that he was too peculiar, too different. 

Adam let the word fly right over his head as if he hadn’t heard it, as if he didn’t get the mockery hidden behind. He kept on singing, as best as he could, and impressing everyone with his talent. 

However, back then, that word hurt deeply. 

***

Later, it was to tell him to tone it down. To remind him that he couldn’t have a career otherwise. That the people who sneered at his nail polish and make-up were the ones who held his very future in their hands. 

It was every single person telling him what he should sing, and how. The way he should dress. How he would never get the record contract he was hoping for if he was that out there.

Adam refused to lie. He kept doing his thing, and moving forward.

Back then, the word meant closed doors and lost opportunities.

***

Now, however, it means knowing what he wants. Knowing how to showcase his voice and his talent at their very best.

Sometimes it means that he drives people up the wall with his never satisfied perfectionism. It also makes him more focused, gives him that drive to attain his goals which others envy. 

Sometimes it means he has people rolling their eyes at him over some of the things he says or does. 

But he’s aware that, from them, the word isn’t an insult. Besides, the results are worth it.

So what if Adam’s a diva? He’s proud of it.


	20. On a Night Like This (Adam/Brian/Johnny/Terrance, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam/Brian/Johnny/Terrance
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #061: Are you gonna... Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

“You’re going out with us, right?” They’re barely off the stage and Terrance already has an arm loosely around Brian’s shoulders, pulling him along. 

Brian laughs. As usual, Terrance is anything but subtle. “Who’s us?” Brian asks as they enter the dressing room. 

Terrance releases him and leans against the wall, shrugging. “You know. Me, Johnny, Adam. You’re coming, right?”

Brian smiles. What he needs is a good night’s sleep. He’s aware that he won’t get one if he goes out with them. 

However, Johnny steps in before he can say no. “You still know how to have fun, right?”

***

“Tempting,” Brian says, “but I’m not sure.”

“You’re coming with us,” Adam drawls from the doorway. “It’s just drinking and dancing. You’re not saying no to that.”

It’s not a question, and as he turns around, Brian finds Adam staring at him. He can’t help but smile as Adam’s expression reminds him of other nights that started just like this one, years ago. 

With that in mind, there’s no way he can say no. Besides, it’s really tempting to forget everything, to go out and dance the night away like they used to, back when they barely knew each other.

***

“Are you gonna stay there by yourself all evening? I thought you still knew how to have fun!” Even as he asks, Terrance pulls Brian onto the dance floor and Brian lets him, glad to have the excuse. 

This isn’t his scene, most people who know him would say. But whenever he’s around Adam or Terrance, it is. With them, it’s easy.

Easy to forget there is a real world full of responsibilities outside. Easy to let Terrance pull him back with a possessive arm around his waist. Easy to move and enjoy the very male body grinding against him.

***

As the night goes on, Brian lets the heat engulf him. They keep moving and switching partners and he moves with them, as he used to a long time ago. 

He watches, with a dry mouth, the moves Johnny uses on Adam with those crazy heels of his. He grinds back against Johnny when he insinuates himself between Brian and Terrance, enjoying the freedom he doesn’t allow himself often.

“I knew you’d still enjoy it,” Adam whispers in Brian’s ear when the movement of the crowd pushes them together. Without thinking, Brian makes Adam bend his head for a kiss.

***

As they kiss, Brian feels Terrance and Johnny pressing closer. There are hands on his body, on Adam’s, searching and finding little strips of skin where their clothing ends. 

When they separate, Brian’s breathing fast and his cock feels harder than it has in years. 

Adam smiles at him and whispers, “You’re in for the night, right?”

Just like that, Brian knows that the night will end in a tangle of limbs and bodies. That he'll wake up tomorrow with a hangover and the wonderful sore feeling that comes from having a hard cock in his ass.

Still, he nods.


	21. Coming to Life (Adam/Brian, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #062: Night and Day. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

The noise everybody else makes moving around on the bus is what wakes Adam up, so abruptly that, for a few seconds, he’s completely disoriented. It takes Brian’s hands around his wrists, Brian’s weight anchoring him to the bed, for him to start breathing easier. 

Last night was nothing but a hard fuck, yet Adam’s still feeling out of it. He’s riding the edge separating night and day, between the person he shows to the world and who he allows himself to be when it’s just him and Brian.

Brian traces soft circles around Adam’s wrists. “You awake yet?”

***

Adam shakes his head. “Not really. I’m a little loopy.”

If he hadn’t been woken up so abruptly, it would be easier. They both know it, but it doesn’t change the fact that Adam has to get back on his feet. 

Brian brushes a soft kiss on the side of Adam’s head. “Take all the time you need. I’ll grab us some coffee.”

When Brian leaves the room, Adam burrows under the covers, and tries his hardest to find his balance again. 

It takes him maybe a minute to admit that, today, he won’t be able to manage it by himself. 

***

Adam makes his way out of bed, not bothering with clothes.

By the time Brian comes back, Adam’s kneeling by the bed, head bowed. 

Eyes closed, he hears Brian put the cups on the bedside table and sit on the bed, right by Adam’s side. Seconds later, Brian’s petting Adam’s hair. Adam lets out a happy sigh.

“That bad, baby?” Brian whispers. 

Adam nods, pushing into the soft touch, and the caress of Brian’s fingers become more intent. 

“Take your time,” Brian says, softly. “The others can wait.”

The reassurance warms Adam all over, and he sinks into the moment. 

***

It won’t last. Today’s obligations are already looming on the horizon. For now, though, he’s taking what he needs to make it through. A few minutes of peace before the madness starts.

After a little scratching through Adam’s hair, Brian sets his hand on the back of Adam’s neck in a firm grip. “Ready to come up?”

Adam straightens his shoulders, some of his armor falling back into place. “Yeah. I’m good.”

The hand on his neck tightens a little more. “Take a deep breath for me. Slowly. In. And out.” 

Adam follows Brian’s lead, already feeling more grounded. 

“Again.”

***

After the fifth long breath, Adam’s finally able to look Brian in the eyes and leave behind the remains of today’s bad wake-up call. He gets a warm smile in return. 

“Coffee?”

Nodding, Adam takes the cup Brian hands him, sitting back as he sips his coffee carefully to avoid burning his mouth. Adam can’t help but smile when Brian puts his hand back on Adam’s neck, just a small, firm pressure as he strokes his thumb over Adam’s skin. 

“Tommy and Ash were talking about going out for breakfast. It would help get your feet back on the ground.”

***

Adam nods. “I think I’d like that.”

Brian’s fingers slip under Adam’s chin, gently bringing him forward for a kiss. “Get dressed. Put your face on. I’ll ask them to wait for us.”

Right before Brian stands, Adam turns his head to kiss Brian’s hand. “Thank you,” he whispers, barely audible. 

“Anytime, boy,” Brian says, so soft and serious that it’s clear he understands everything Adam isn’t saying. How Adam sometimes feels like the only thing that lets him get through the day is the way Brian takes him apart at night, and leaves him standing stronger the next morning.


	22. Looking After Him (Adam/Brian, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #063: Try This. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

The feeling hits Adam at some point between soundcheck and the actual show. Just a little edge of dizziness that lets him know he’s even more exhausted than he first thought, and that if he isn’t sick yet, he will be soon. 

He’s in the middle of getting ready for the red carpet. His busy schedule won’t disappear because he’s not feeling well and this reminder that he’s asked a lot of himself in the last couple of weeks has him scared enough that he lets out a little, “Fuck, no.” 

As quiet as he can, but still too loud.

***

Too loud, because it makes Brian look up from whatever he was doing on his phone and ask, “You okay?”

Adam takes a deep breath, but it’s not enough to make the dizziness go away. He swallows down the lie he was about to tell and shakes his head. “Exhausted, and I’m starting to feel it.”

“Why didn’t you say anything during soundcheck?”

It’s nothing but a question, yet it has Adam crossing his arms as he turns around to face Brian, all of his defensive walls going up. “Because it doesn’t matter now. I’m not bailing on the fans.”

***

“I wouldn’t ask you to. You know that.”

Adam does, but he clings to his frustration, aware that it’s the only thing that might hold him up and give him the adrenaline he needs to make it through tonight’s performance. While he shouldn’t take it out on Brian, right now, he doesn’t care. 

Truth is, he’s angry at himself for not noticing, and maybe he feels a little like he should be stronger and should be able to handle everything. 

Which is why, when Brian says, “Come here,” Adam turns his back on him again. 

“I need to get ready.”

***

Adam gets even more frustrated when he realizes that he’s so tense all over that his fingers are trembling. He’s trying his hardest to focus on what he’s doing until Brian steps right into Adam’s space and closes his hand around Adam’s fingers, stopping them from twitching.

Adam sighs. He wants to rip his fingers out of Brian’s hand. Now that Brian can feel how much Adam’s shaking, there’s no way Adam can pretend that he’s okay. 

“Stop and listen to me for a second.”

Adam puts the brush he was using back on the table, and says, “I’m listening.”

***

“Let’s try this. You make it through tonight’s show, and we’ll see how you’re doing after that. If you’re fine, I’m not saying anything. But if you’re not? You said it yourself, Adam. You’re exhausted. You need to rest.”

Adam can’t really argue with that, but he still tries. “I don’t have time for it.”

“If you bail on the after party, yes, you do.” Brian releases Adam’s fingers, and Adam looks down at the table. 

“Why should I listen to you?”

He hears Brian sigh. “If you’re looking for a fight, you won’t get one. Not here, not now.” 

***

It’s like a slap in the face and it makes Adam even shakier. That must show on his face because Brian rests his hand on Adam’s shoulder.

“I’m not saying I’ll let it slide.”

Adam risks a glance at Brian, and a blush creeps up his face when he realizes, from the way Brian’s looking at him, that while Brian’s not taking the bait now, Adam won’t escape the consequences once they’re home, either. 

The reminder manages to push the frustration to the back of his mind. Everything falls back into place, and his world slowly sets itself right again. 

***

“You don’t have to listen to me,” Brian says after a few seconds of silence. “It’s your choice. Always.”

The words hit Adam full on as they remind him that Brian’s current frustration with him isn’t even about Adam’s attitude. Not under these circumstances. Here and there, it’s about the fact that Adam was aware he was getting too tired, and yet he powered on and didn’t say a thing. 

Which he promised many times he wouldn’t do. 

It’s so easy to forget, though. To focus only on what he has to do, to keep going and forget his limits.

***

Even the limits he chose himself because he’s aware that he needs something to hold him back from the edge.

Grabbing onto the table with both hands, Adam takes a deep breath as he tries to sort out the mess of his thoughts. He needs this, needs the rules and expectations, the loving care Brian always gives him. But sometimes it feels like he’s at war with himself, caught between what he needs and can’t ask for, and the expectations he has for himself. 

He knows he would push himself past exhaustion if he didn’t have someone to stop him.

***

Once he’s at peace again, he can bring himself to apologize. “I’m sorry.”

“No, you’re not,” Brian says as he steps closer, dropping his voice to a whisper. “But you will be.”

The promise is only half-serious. It still makes Adam’s blood rush south, and his mouth is dry when he says, “Okay. Let’s see how I’m doing after the show.”

“And then?”

Adam still wants to rebel and regain some of his control. But he reminds himself that, on a post-show adrenaline high, he won’t be able to judge how he’s doing. “It’s your call about the after party.”

***

Brian tightens his grip on Adam’s shoulder. “Good boy.”

The praise brings the smallest smile to Adam’s lips. Without thinking, he brings a hand to Brian’s on his shoulder, and squeezes. 

“I’ll let you get ready.” Brian steps away.

Adam’s breathing a little easier, even though the edge of dizziness is still present and scary. He doesn’t have time to be sick. However, having Brian take the choice of getting the rest he needs out of his hands, has pushed the fear to the back of his mind.

One of the many ways in which Brian always has Adam’s back. 

***

By the time Adam steps off the stage, the edge of dizziness has gone away. He’s high on life and adrenaline. He feels unstoppable, once again. 

So when he finally gets a second to himself to breathe and Brian corners him, he just shrugs. “I swear I’m doing okay.”

“I can see that,” Brian replies. “But that doesn’t make the exhaustion go away. And it doesn’t change the fact that once we get home, your schedule will be just as insane.”

Adam grits his teeth. “Bri, come on. I’m good.”

Brian shakes his head. “Don’t argue. You know I’m right.”

***

Adam wants to argue, but he doesn’t get a chance to. Before he can open his mouth, a member of his team spots them and he’s swept away for another round of obligations. 

They finally make it back to the hotel, and Terrance hooks an arm around Adam’s shoulders. “Ready for the after party?” he asks, eyes shining.

It would be easy, it is tempting to say yes. But the adrenaline’s wearing off and Adam can feel Brian looking at him from where he’s standing, reminding him that even if he’s feeling better, he agreed to go with Brian’s decision. 

***

So he smiles at Terrance but shakes his head. “I’m starting to feel sick. I’m gonna try and sleep it off instead.”

Of course, as soon as he says that, he has to listen to everyone telling him to be careful and to get some rest, and it’s a couple more minutes before he can finally escape to his hotel room. 

Adam takes a good, long shower, and when he gets out, he’s surprised to find Brian still in the room. “You should go out with them. I’m just gonna sleep, I promise. I don’t need you looking after me.”

***

Brian doesn’t move as Adam makes his way to the bed, but seconds after he closes his eyes, he feels fingers gently brushing the hair away from his forehead. He opens his eyes again and sees Brian standing next to him. 

“Did it even occur to you that this is where I want to be? Besides, you’re not the only one who’s not getting enough sleep.”

Adam smiles sleepily as Brian bends to give him a loving and tender kiss. He tries to say something, but Brian shakes his head.

“Don’t worry about me. Just sleep, boy.”

And Adam does.


	23. Where He Belongs (Adam/Sauli/Terrance, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam/Sauli/Terrance
> 
> Content/Warnings: ...allusions to knotting, I guess? (But come on, it's a fic and they are werewolves, what were you expecting? :P)
> 
> Written for prompt #064: Homeless. Thanks to Aislinn for the beta.

This had been moved to [Forged in Flame](http://archiveofourown.org/works/732645/chapters/1361563), where I've reposted all the drabble-sets of this 'verse in chronological order and where I'll post any new drabble-sets that happen in the same 'verse.


	24. The First Step (Adam/Brian, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Content/Warnings: D/s (which is pretty much par for the course for me writing them, but. Just in case.)
> 
> Written for prompt #065: Close Shave. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

They’ve been back home for a couple of days already, but they’re still caught in the precarious balance they try to achieve while they’re away. At first, it was because they were waiting for a couple of days of downtime, so they could focus on nothing but here and now. 

When that time finally arrived, it became clear that Adam was nowhere near ready to let go. He still isn’t sure if he’s ready. But he’s aware that he needs a clean break between the balance they achieve on tour and how he needs them to be once they’re back home. 

***

It takes one more day for Adam to realize that Brian won’t push unless Adam takes the first step. Adam’s still nowhere near where he should be, but it’s one of those moments when it feels like he’s forgotten how to stop. As if after so many months of maddening go-go-go, Adam has no idea how to live with nothing on his schedule. 

It always happens, but it isn’t usually this bad. 

That night, Adam admits that waiting any longer won’t change a thing. It doesn’t matter how hard he tries. He won’t get there by himself. Not this time. 

***

So that night after dinner, instead of settling on the couch by Brian’s side, Adam drops to his knees on the floor in front of him. 

Only a sharp intake of breath lets him know that he’s taken Brian by surprise. They’re both aware that Adam is still half-caught in the tour headspace, when so many things depend on him and they have to juggle Adam’s obligations and the way they are, the way they can’t help being when it’s just the two of them.

Yet here he is, asking in the only way he can bring himself to.

***

It takes mere seconds before there’s a pillow on the floor for Adam to kneel on, before he feels Brian’s fingers stroking the fine hair at the back of his neck, yet it seems like an eternity.

“You’re always so pretty for me. You ready, baby?” 

Without thinking, Adam replies, “Yeah, I’m good.”

Brian curls his fingers in Adam’s hair, tight enough to hurt, and pulls his head back. Adam can barely hold in a whimper. 

“Not good enough.”

It’s not really a warning. Just a reminder that, if he wants this to happen, Adam has to meet Brian halfway. 

***

Adam nearly wishes he could look away or close his eyes. But Brian doesn’t relent, and the way he stares at Adam is enough to give Adam the little push he needs to find his ground faster. 

He forces himself to breathe through the tight grip Brian has on his hair, once, twice. Then he can finally bring himself to say, softly, “Yes, sir. I’m ready now.”

Brian’s hold on his hair turns gentle, offering a caress. “Good boy.”

Adam bows his head and falls into the moment. He lets himself forget everything except Brian’s kind words and gentle touch. 

***

After a couple more minutes, when Adam’s breath is soft and even, Brian rests his hand on the back of Adam’s neck. 

“Clothes off, boy.”

Adam sighs in relief as he obeys. The wheels of thought in his mind haven’t yet stopped, but everything already feels slower, the edges blurry and soft. It’s easy to do as Brian says, to let Brian show him the way to where he needs to be.

Once everything’s off, Adam kneels again. He blushes under the scrutiny of Brian’s gaze, and moans when Brian curls his fingers in the short hair surrounding his cock. 

***

“Time to get rid of this, baby. Come on.”

Brian stands and walks away without even looking back to make sure Adam follows him. They both know he will.

This is always the first step. The clean cut Adam needs between his demanding career and the way they roll when it’s just the two of them, in the safety of their home. 

When he’s away, Adam keeps the hair clean and trimmed but lets it grow. Until he’s back home and finally finds it in himself to stop and ask for the downtime he needs. 

Then Brian shaves him bare.


	25. Behind His Walls (Adam/Brian, R)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for open week, using prompt #065: Close Shave. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

Adam’s holding the side of the bed like a lifeline, tension written all over his body. It doesn’t matter how much he wants, how much he needs that intimate first step. It always scares him.

The sight of the razor in Brian’s hand is all it takes. Now the little bit of peace Adam found earlier is nowhere in sight. The harder he tries, the farther it slips through his fingers, until he has nothing left to hold onto. 

He gets even tenser because he’s frustrated with himself. He knows he needs this, but today he can’t help fighting it.

***

“Deep breath, baby,” Brian says, low and caressing, kneading the muscles of Adam’s thighs, chasing the nervousness away with the gentle touch of his fingers. 

Adam takes one long breath, in and out. Some of the fear fades away, but he still can’t find the feeling of peace he usually gets from this. He’s so far from it, it’s not even funny.

“Ready?”

Adam pushes through, forces himself to relax another fraction. He’s not ready. He can’t be. “Yes, sir. I’m ready.”

The lie has to show on his face, because the grip Brian has on his thighs turns punishing. 

***

It only makes the fear reappear, and Adam’s breath hitches when he feels the smallest hint of fingernails. There’s the warning tap of two fingers against his thigh.

“Stop thinking.”

Adam can’t help but laugh a little at that. “I’m trying.”

“Focus on this. Focus on me. Let me get you there.”

It sounds enough like a command enough to force Adam to take a step back and realize that he isn’t really trying. There is still a wall between them, strong enough that Brian can’t step through unless Adam lets him. 

After another slow breath, Adam admits, “I’m scared.”

***

The touch on his thigh becomes an approving caress, reminding him that even though he’s not there yet, he’s just taken a step in the right direction. 

“I know you are,” Brian whispers. “But you have to accept it. Give that fear to me. Let me carry you.”

Adam’s still caught in his own struggle, aware that letting go of that fear means giving Brian his whole being. He’s still far enough from his headspace to want to back off and resist. 

He stays silent for so long that Brian stands and grabs Adam’s chin to make him look up.

***

“Are you safewording out?”

Adam’s eyes widen with surprise. It takes him a couple of seconds to understand that he’s so far from where he should be that Brian’s thinking they should wait a little while longer.

On another day, Adam might agree. At this point, though, he’s aware that waiting any longer won’t help. He’s in a place where letting go seems like an impossibility. It doesn’t matter how much he wants to, how much he needs to. He won’t get any closer by himself. 

He knows that, but he’s not ready to admit defeat just yet. “I’m not.” 

***

Brian seems to get that the usual coaxing won’t work. He nods and grabs Adam’s neck in a tight grip, pulling at the small hairs on the back of his neck. “Then stop fighting me. I won’t let you cheat either of us. Is that clear?”

Adam breathes easier when he understands what Brian means. _Stop fighting yourself._ It’s what he’s been doing, what he often does. In moments like this one, it feels like Adam’s his own worst enemy. 

The only thing holding him back from release is the wall he always keeps up between himself and the world. 

***

Adam doesn’t reply. Brian’s hold on his hair turns painful. 

“I said, is that clear?” Brian’s tone is now sharp and demanding enough that Adam can’t help but react. 

The feeling that Brian won’t let him back off gets him closer to where he should be, and there’s complete honesty in his voice when he replies, softly, “Yes, sir. I understand.” 

The _sir_ rolls off his tongue without an effort because he finally means it. This, right here, is the moment when he admits and accepts Brian’s authority over him. 

“Good boy.” The praise pushes Adam a little bit farther. 

***

However, the usual accompanying smile is nowhere in sight. Adam’s aware he’ll have to work for that smile. 

Another deep breath, and he spreads his legs wider as he says, again, without trying to look away from Brian, “I’m ready, sir.”

Brian releases his hold on Adam’s hair, fingers caressing, gently soothing the pain away. He still doesn’t say a word, staring down at Adam, waiting, expecting. 

A couple more seconds and Adam’s breath evens out as he lowers his gaze and repeats, his voice barely above a whisper, “I’m ready, sir.”

There’s an approving, tender kiss on his forehead.

***

“Yes. Now you are.”

Adam’s still holding tight onto the bed as Brian spreads the shaving foam over him, but his breathing stays slow and even. 

Brian looks at him, waiting, razor in hand, until Adam can’t take it anymore and the first, “Please,” falls from his lips. 

“Keep breathing,” Brian reminds him as he holds Adam’s cock out of his way. 

With each drag of the razor, Adam feels more vulnerable, like Brian’s chipping away Adam’s protective walls, little by little, as surely as he’s shaving off Adam’s hair. 

His cock fills in Brian’s hand as the sensations intensify. 

***

There’s the feeling of cold air, then Brian’s hot fingers on newly bare skin.

“You still with me?” Brian asks.

Adam shivers, the blush on his cheeks creeps down his neck. His cock is still pulsing in Brian’s hand, but he knows he can’t hope for release until they are done. “Yes, sir.”

“Good boy.”

Adam’s breath hitches when Brian spreads more foam over Adam’s balls. Seconds later, there’s Brian’s soothing hand on his thigh. 

“Trust me.”

It’s too many sensations all at once, and a feeling that he’s not just being shaved, he’s being stripped to his very core. 

***

After two long breaths, Adam splays his thighs wider and whispers, “How could I not?”

He can’t look away from Brian’s careful, assured hands, can’t feel anything beyond the repeated steady passes of the razor over his skin. Slowly, carefully Brian shaves away the hair around Adam’s balls, and the little hair there is on them. The sharpness of the razor blade against sensitive skin draws a whimper out of Adam’s mouth. 

Once he’s done, Brian looks at Adam, the hint of a wicked smile on his lips. “Bare all the way, baby?”

The question surprises Adam for a second.

***

Then he realizes, from the way Brian gazes at him, that it’s not a choice. Brian just wants to hear him say it. Another step toward where he needs to be, where Brian is slowly leading him. 

Barely able to think beyond what’s happening now, Adam repeats, “Yes, please. Bare all the way.”

“Lie down.”

Adam obeys, closes his eyes and shivers when he feels Brian spread his ass cheeks wide with one hand as he covers Adam’s skin with foam. Adam lets out a sobbing breath at the first pass of the razor over the skin of his ass.

***

It feels too intimate and too scary. A reminder that Brian knows exactly how to get Adam to his breaking point, and that Adam will let him.

“We’re nearly done. You can take it.”

Adam shakes his head, desperate, trying his hardest not to move against the drag of the razor over his most sensitive skin. 

Seconds later, Brian’s wiping away the foam with a wet cloth, and Adam sighs. He’s very aware they’re not done yet, but he still hopes. Even if it means being left with the uncomfortable feeling of a hard-on that won’t be taken care of. 

***

Instead he feels Brian’s fingers on his skin, following the same lines as the razor had, purposely avoiding Adam’s cock. 

Every sensation heightens on his shaven skin, going right to his cock. It feels ten times more intense than it did before, and Adam back arches when Brian’s thumb presses against his hole. 

The sensation draws a ragged, “Fuck,” out of Adam’s mouth, but Brian only trails his other fingers over Adam’s skin, still nowhere near his cock.

“You know what I’m waiting for.”

Adam shakes his head, even as the pressure against his hole increases. “I can’t. I can’t.”

***

“Yes, you can.” There’s the drag of fingers, again, so light that Adam barely feels them. “I know how good you can be for me.”

A little more pressure on his hole and he feels the muscle give, but it’s not enough, barely a tease of what he wants, what he needs. Adam’s breath catches in his throat when Brian plays with the skin around his balls, every sensation pushing him a little farther.

“Fall, baby. Let me catch you.”

When the light scrape of Brian’s nail follows the line of Adam’s cock, the first wall breaks, and Adam begs.


	26. Take it Off (Brian/Tommy, NC-17)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warning: None
> 
> Written for open week, using prompt #52: Shiver. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [this](https://twitter.com/brianlondon/status/285135886897786880/photo/1) and the ~~amazing~~ evil enablers on my feed.

Tommy’s hoodie lies forgotten on a chair, all he had time to take off before Brian manhandled him onto the bed. 

After that, Tommy can’t help but lose himself in Brian’s kisses and in the glorious pressure of Brian’s hard cock against his own, even though it’s not quite enough through their clothes. 

Brian is holding Tommy’s hands over his head and has a tight grip around Tommy’s wrists. 

Tommy throws his head back when Brian trails kisses along Tommy’s jaw and neck, his teeth closing over Tommy’s pulse point long enough for Tommy’s breath to catch in his throat.

***

It’s only when Brian wraps one hand around both of Tommy’s wrists, pulls Tommy’s leg over his own hip, lines up their cocks, making Tommy shiver, that Tommy understands what Brian intends to do.

“Not in my fucking pants, come on!”

He struggles against Brian’s hold, but all that does is make Brian tighten his grip. His fingers bite into the skin of Tommy’s wrist and of his leg.

“Why not?” Brian asks, so sweetly that Tommy knows he’s in for the ride of his life. “You’re the one who said it was too cold to take off your clothes.”

***

Tommy’s mouth drops open. Yes, he did say that, but he was shivering when they got off the plane. Brian can’t hold him to those words. 

“I didn’t mean it like that,” he says, only to stop when he sees Brian laugh.

“But I do,” Brian replies, still holding Tommy tight enough that he can barely move. “Those were your exact words. That it was too cold to take anything off.”

Tommy glares at Brian, frustration written all over his face. He hates the mockery he can hear in Brian’s voice, but he can’t help how hard it makes him. 

***

He should know better, and should shut up. By now, Tommy’s aware that egging on Brian when he’s being that much of a tease will only make the whole thing worse. 

But maybe, just maybe, Tommy’s curious about where this is going. So instead of going lax in Brian’s grip the way he’s tempted to, he struggles again and bites out, “Asshole.”

“You think so?” Brian asks, all sweet and soft, with the smile that makes Tommy feel like Brian is about to eat him alive. “Do you know what I’d have done if I was that much of an ass?”

***

The question is enough to hold Tommy immobile, breath catching in his throat as he waits. Until he realizes that if he wants this to go anywhere, one of them has to give, and it won’t be Brian. 

His mouth is so dry, thanks to the pictures appearing in his mind from Brian’s last words, that it takes a couple of second before he can ask, “What?”

Brian’s smile loses some of its edge, leaving behind the fond smile Tommy’s used to. He loosens his grip around Tommy’s wrists, but Tommy doesn’t move. Brian’s gaze holds him in place. 

***

“I wouldn’t have waited for us to get to the hotel.” Brian’s voice is barely above a whisper, but Tommy can hear every word clear as day. “I’d have cornered you in rehearsal and got my hand down your pants where anybody could catch us.”

Tommy sucks in a breath at the thought and rocks his hips to press his cock harder against Brian. 

He gets an approving smile and a kiss as Brian moves, just enough that his thigh is now between Tommy’s legs, giving just the right, maddening pressure against Tommy’s cock. 

“You love that idea, don’t you?”

***

Tommy nods and moans when Brian presses closer, giving Tommy his thigh to thrust against as he wishes. 

“Maybe I’d have made you fuck yourself on my fingers where anyone could see us. Maybe one of them would have spotted us and not looked away.” There’s something in the way Brian stares at Tommy that feels like he’s seeing deep down in Tommy’s soul. “Maybe Terrance.”

The reminder that Brian knows him well enough to know exactly which fucking button to push makes Tommy shudder and thrust harder against Brian’s thigh. He hates and loves how well Brian gets him. 

***

Brian smiles at Tommy’s reaction and keeps going. “You’d have loved that. You’d be so pretty, baby. With your eyes closed and that cute blush on your face, because you’re aware that he’s watching you, that he can’t look away from you.”

“So this?” Brian presses closer, pushing his thigh against Tommy’s cock and making Tommy throw his head back, exhaling a shaky breath. “This is me being nice.”

Brian releases Tommy’s hands but Tommy doesn’t even think of moving. He’s unable to focus on anything beyond Brian’s words and the maddening, glorious pressure of his thigh against Tommy’s cock. 

***

“Because if I’d wanted? I could have made you come during rehearsal, leaving you uncomfortable and sticky until we finally made it back to the hotel. And even if someone had caught us,” Brian trails his fingers over the side of Tommy’s face in a loving caress, “if I’d refused to stop? You know you’re always such a pretty slut for me that you would have let me.”

A blush creeps across Tommy’s cheeks and down his neck, a mix of shame and a weird kind of pride because there’s nothing demeaning about the fond way Brian uses that word. 

***

It hits Tommy in such a way that he can’t stop the, “Yes, please, _please_ ,” that escapes him.

That earns him an approving smile as Brian says, tenderly, “Oh, yes, you really are.” 

There’s a little more pressure on Tommy’s cock, just enough that he can’t do anything but thrust into it. 

“You’re always so good for me, baby,” Brian says as he rocks his thigh into Tommy’s thrust. “So good, and all mine.”

Tommy keens at that, so far gone that he doesn’t care that he’s going to come in his pants. He’s enjoying this too much to care.

***

The pressure of Brian’s thigh feels so right, stopping just short of being painful. Tommy can’t help but push into it, getting himself a little bit closer every time. 

“You would let me,” Brian says again, and Tommy shivers because he can’t deny it. “And now you’re going to come just like that. Just because I want to see you lose yourself for me.”

Tommy gasps. He’s nearly there, but it’s not enough, it can’t be. He wants more, he needs more. “Want to feel you… _please_.”

“But it’s too cold,” Brian reminds him, a laugh hiding behind his words.

***

Tommy shakes his head, getting desperate. “Not too cold, please, _please_!”

Brian shakes his head. “Those were your exact words, baby. That it was too cold to take anything off. Now deal with the consequences.”

Tommy tries to protest, but Brian doesn’t listen. He bends over Tommy, licking and sucking his neck. “You know you want it, baby. You want me to make you come like that. Because if you didn’t? You’d have moved when I released your hands.”

Tommy wants to deny it but he can’t. He’s at the point where nothing matters except what Brian’s expecting of him. 

***

Besides, he needs this, needs the reminder that he’s Brian’s and not anyone else’s, that he’ll take whatever Brian chooses to hand him because he needs to please Brian. 

“Go ahead, baby,” Brian says as he worries Tommy’s neck with his mouth. “Come for me. Show me how good you can be.” 

Brian drops a tender kiss on Tommy’s pulse point right before he says, “So good, and all _mine_.” 

Then he bites down, hard, and Tommy screams as Brian’s words, his bite on Tommy’s neck, his pressure on Tommy’s cock make Tommy tip over into darkness when he comes.

***

When Tommy opens his eyes again, it’s to find Brian kneeling over him, his crotch mere inches from Tommy’s face and his fingers playing gently with Tommy’s bangs. 

“You back with me?”

Tommy nods and his mouth waters at the sight, even though Brian’s cock is still hidden in his pants. Tommy’s sticky and sweaty but none of that matters, all he can think of is sucking Brian off. 

Without thinking, he reaches for Brian’s hips. “Let me, let me, please…”

Seconds later, there’s a hand in his hair, pulling his head back to make him look up at Brian. 

***

“It’s your choice, baby.”

It takes Tommy a moment to realize that, if they do it this way, he won’t have any control on how far or how fast Brian goes. All he’ll be able to do is lie there and take it, any way Brian wishes to give it to him. 

Yet the last thing he wants is to say no. He needs the loss of control so badly, he can practically taste it. So he nods, until he understands, from the way Brian looks at him, that it won’t be enough. He’ll need to say it out loud.

***

He swallows hard, the bruise left behind by Brian’s bite throbbing on his neck. Tommy’s glad, in a way, that he’ll have this reminder, but he needs a little more. 

“Please. I want you to use my mouth.” Tommy blushes in shame at the words, but the approval he can read in Brian’s eyes is enough to keep him going. “Make me choke on your dick. _Please_.”

Something dark passes over Brian’s face, and Tommy shivers. He realizes that Brian’s going to use every single of Tommy’s words against him and take him down even deeper. 

And Tommy can’t wait.


	27. Nights Like This (Adam/Brian, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: D/s
> 
> Written for prompt #66: Sight. Thanks to Leela for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

Any other day, it’s touching that gives Brian this high. On nights like this one, though, he loves to watch. 

It’s been so long, far too many weeks of long days and short nights. Of watching Adam run around and push himself just that little bit too far. Of being painfully aware that they don’t have the time for Brian to really do something about it, to help Adam. That, sometimes, he can barely pull Adam from the edge, just before he tumbles over it. 

Tonight, though, they’re back at home, and they have all the time in the world. 

***

So Brian takes his time and watches. 

He feasts on the way Adam relaxes in his bonds as tension seeps out of his body with every single one of Brian’s touches. 

He memorizes every mark he leaves behind as he turns Adam’s skin into a patchwork of red, black and blue. 

He feeds on the trust and complete abandon he can see in Adam’s eyes, and hopes like hell that he’ll always be worthy of it. 

He finds his ground in the knowledge that he’s the only one who gets to see Adam like this. 

Vulnerable, gorgeous, perfect. And _his_.


	28. The Music in Him (Adam/Brian/Tommy, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #67: Hearing. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

Tommy first knows something’s wrong when he realizes that he can’t hear the music anymore. 

He can still hear his guitar, but it’s wailing and crying, hurting. Gone are the days when it sang happily within his soul. 

The magic that turned his guitar’s song into music has vanished. The place in Tommy’s soul that used to be filled with soft humming and the gentle notes of piano is nothing but a black hole.

The guitar screams Tommy’s pain to the world as he realizes that it’s not just the music. Adam and Brian are gone, too.

He’s lost them.


	29. First Taste (Adam/Sauli, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #068: Taste. Many thanks to [Leela](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Leela/pseuds/Leela) for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

“Remember the rules,” Adam says, hiding his hand behind his back. “Close your eyes.”

Sauli obeys, opening his mouth. He smiles as he recognizes the sweet, sweet taste of candy, and doesn’t hesitate. “Jenny Woo.”

He opens his eyes to see Adam pouting.

“That was too easy.”

Sauli shrugs. “Easy, maybe. But, if you ask me, not the taste I’d have chosen.”

He moves on the couch, getting closer to Adam, and watches the heat flare in Adam’s eyes.

“Why not?” Adam asks, already breathless.

“Because that lollipop tasted good, yes, but it’s not the taste I remember the most.”

***

“It’s not?” Adam repeats as Sauli inches nearer. “What do you remember, then?”

When he speaks again, Sauli’s so close that he can feel Adam’s lips right next to his, their breath mingling. “That candy, but from the moment I tasted it from your mouth.”

He kisses Adam then, a quick, hot press of lips and tongue, just long enough for the piece of candy to end up in Adam’s mouth. 

Adam tries to grab for Sauli, but Sauli bats his hands away. He straddles Adam’s lap instead and watches Adam’s hands curl around nothing and stay on the couch. 

***

He waits, grinning when Adam leaves his hands where they are and doesn’t try to grab Sauli again.

“What else do you remember?”

There’s a hint of a smile on Adam’s face, just enough to let Sauli know he’s not the only one who thinks this game is a lot more interesting than the one they were playing a few seconds ago. 

Sauli rests his hands on Adam’s shoulders and brings their forehead together. “I remember the taste of your moans and groans the first time you were inside me. The taste of your kisses when you came in me.”

***

Adam reaches for Sauli again but he’s not fast enough. Sauli lowers himself to the floor, kneels between Adam’s legs, and brings his hands to Adam’s thighs, feeling the heat through his clothes.

“I remember when I tasted you all over.” Adam’s shudder makes Sauli smile, his own cock hardening from the images he’s painting. “The taste of your skin, your sweat.” 

Sauli bends forward until he’s mere inches from Adam’s crotch, then he looks up at Adam through his eyelashes. “I remember the first time I really tasted you, the first time I had your cock in my mouth.”

***

Adam’s hips buck against his will, only the grip of Sauli’s hands on his thighs keeping him on the couch. 

“I wanted to keep that taste in my mouth and learn you inside and out. I wanted to find out what would make you moan and groan, and what would make you scream for me.”

“You’re asking for trouble, Sauli.” The warning is clear in Adam’s voice. “Stop teasing.”

Instead, Sauli pushes his hands higher on Adam’s thighs until he’s framing Adam’s cock though his jeans then he looks up again, a challenge written over his whole body. 

“Make me.”


	30. Table for Two (Adam/Brian, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: D/s
> 
> Written for prompt #069: Smell. Timeline wise, this happens at some point before Adam's time on Idol. Many thanks to [Leela](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Leela/pseuds/Leela) for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

The smell of food cooking makes Adam’s stomach rumble as soon as he enters Brian’s place. After a long day of rehearsal, he’s tired and hungry, and the idea of a good meal sounds like heaven. It’s nearly enough to send him straight to the kitchen, but he’s aware that that won’t get him the rest he needs. Only one thing can. If he wants it, he has to follow the rules. 

He takes his time, leaving his shoes by the door and walking barefoot to the bathroom. He’s already had a shower and washed his hair before coming here. 

***

All that’s left is taking the make-up off his face. 

Once he’s done, Adam grabs the counter with both hands and takes a deep breath. It always scares him a little, this moment when he has to let go of his armor and present himself with his face bare. 

One more long breath and he’s already feeling a little more grounded, as every small, familiar step slowly gets him closer to where he should be. 

When he’s finally ready, he walks out and lets the smell guide him to the kitchen, where Brian is standing in front of the oven. 

***

“I was wondering how long it would take you,” Brian says. “Come here.”

Adam lets himself be pulled in for a kiss and can’t resist letting his head drop on Brian’s shoulder for a second. Brian pulls him closer with an arm tight around his waist. “You okay?”

Adam nods. “Tired.”

“Anything else I should know, boy?”

Adam swallows down the automatic response that comes to him and takes the time to think. He’s aware it’s not just a rhetorical question and that, here and now, he owes Brian honesty. Slowly, he shakes his head. “No. I’m just really tired.”

***

“Okay. If you say so.” Brian releases Adam just far enough that he can look at Adam from head to toe, making him blush under the intensity of Brian’s gaze. 

Brian seems satisfied with what he finds. When he looks at Adam in the eyes again, it’s with a small approving smile that warms Adam all over before Brian turns toward the food cooking in the oven.

“It smells delicious,” Adam says, right before his stomach rumbles with hunger again, making them both laugh.

“It might smell good, but it’s not ready yet. Sit here and help me with this.”

***

Adam takes the plate of vegetables Brian hands him without questioning it. He’s long past the point of fighting that kind of request. It’s become part of a routine that makes everything easier. 

The easy conversation creates a little cocoon around them, a space of intimacy and affection that allows Adam to hide from the real world and let go. The last of his protective walls are slowly taken away without making him feel like he needs to hold onto them. 

When the food is ready, Adam’s fear and nervous anticipation are gone, leaving nothing but a precious certainty behind.

***

The table is set for two, but Adam’s aware that the only reason it’s always set for two is that Brian’s been waiting for him to be ready. 

Tonight, when he realizes that all the food’s been cut into bite size portions and that Brian intends to feed him, Adam doesn’t hesitate before going to his knees beside Brian’s chair. 

“Oh, baby.” For a second, there’s the barely there, soft caress of Brian’s fingers in Adam’s hair. “You’re always so good for me.”

Brian grabs a pillow from the couch and put it on the floor in front of Adam. 

***

“Kneel here. Don’t hurt yourself.”

Gratefully, Adam grabs the pillow and rearranges himself as Brian pulls his chair to face him. 

The approbation in Brian’s gaze as his fingers touch Adam’s cheek fills Adam with a strange kind of pride. 

“Hungry?”

Adam can’t help but smile at that. “I’m starving.”

Brian grabs a bite of food from the table. “Open up.”

Adam obeys, sighing in pleasure as flavor bursts in his mouth with the first piece Brian feeds him. He lets himself be lulled by Brian’s gentle touch as they slowly eat their dinner, Brian alternating between himself and Adam. 

***

The wheels of thought in Adam’s mind haven’t completely stopped turning yet, but he’s already feeling lighter. His worries over the show he’s currently doing and what – _if_ – will happen after it’s over fade to the back of his mind. 

Once they’re done with dinner, Adam follows Brian to the living room. Brian sits on the couch, and Adam kneels on the floor by his side. 

Adam rests his head on Brian’s thigh and let Brian’s gentle touches carry him away.

Until nothing exists anymore but this moment and the two of them, together, and Adam finally feels at peace.


	31. Phantom Touches (Adam, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #070: Touch. Another little look at my GRBB 'verse, this time from Adam's POV. Many thanks to [Leela](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Leela/pseuds/Leela) for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

Making it through the day is easy, even though it’s a little bit weird because nothing ever feels familiar the way Adam’s told it should. But at night he hurts.

At night, he’s taken captive by strange dreams that leave him tossing and turning, searching for the phantom touch of two other bodies in his bed. 

In his sleep, he can’t help but reach for them, for their hands, their bodies. Sometimes he could swear that he feels them. 

Hands that are gentle or grip tight. Teeth that tease or that bite. Skin clinging to his as they make love.

***

He reaches for them, his fingers closing over air as he realizes, once again, that he’s alone in his bed. Yet as soon as he closes his eyes, they’re both back with him. 

Phantom touches that exist only in his mind, but that feel so real at night. 

Kisses stealing his breath away. Fingers leaving bruises on his skin. Scratches and nibbles. Teasing caresses. 

He always wakes up sweaty, scared, and lonely, and sometimes with guitar riffs and notes from a piano echoing through his mind. 

Unsurprisingly, he’ll have forgotten come morning.

After all, Adam never really cared about music.


	32. Confession Circle (Tommy, Ashley, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Tommy, Ashley (plus most of the current band/dancers line-up, and references to a couple of pairings)
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #071: Flexible. Many thanks to [Leela](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Leela/pseuds/Leela) for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

If anyone ever asks Tommy how the fuck this conversation started, he’s blaming booze. And weed. And the fact that half the band and dancers are either gay or really fucking bendy. 

And Terrance with his oh-so-awesome timing for bringing up old Glam Nation Tour memories that somehow all involve Tommy and Adam making out. And not the kind that happened on stage and was caught on camera. 

And, well, the mix of weed and booze is really good at making people admit certain things.

And it would be a really big lie to say that Tommy isn’t enjoying it.

***

So there’s Terrance teasing the shit out of him – to which Tommy can only reply, “Who the fuck would say no to making out with Adam?” Which finally shuts Terrance up. 

There’s Adam and Johnny dropping hints about their time on the Zodiac show until Brian protests, “What? It’s called being young.” And it should stop there, really, except Rick coughs, “South Africa,” and Brian kicks him, making everyone laugh. 

They laugh even harder when Johnny coos at Brian, “Like we had to try that hard to seduce you,” and Brian flips him off. But Tommy notices he’s still smiling.

***

The little confession circle keeps going, and the stories keeps getting dirtier, until someone turns to Rick, who shakes his head. “Nope. I’m not even a little bendy.”

And Tommy thinks they’re done, but apparently they need to go through everybody. So it’s only logical that Johnny looks at Ashley, who’s talking with Keisha and Reyna and hasn’t been paying attention, and asks jokingly, “What about you, Ash? Flexible or not?”

Without even looking at any of them, Ashley replies, “Of course I’m flexible.”

You could hear a pin drop after she says that as everyone is shocked into silence.

***

Tommy goes from half-hard to full-on boner in a nanosecond. From the looks on Brian’s and Rick’s faces, he isn’t the only one who can’t help imagining it. 

“What? With all the horse riding I do, what were you expecting?” 

Silence is the only answer she gets. She looks over at them, her face the perfect picture of innocence. “What were you guys thinking about?”

All Tommy can think is that he needs to investigate this. There’s no mistaking the hint of a smirk on Ashley’s face. She knew exactly what she was saying and the effect it would have.


	33. Expectations and Revelations (Adam/Sauli/Terrance, Tommy, Sutan, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli/Terrance, Tommy, Sutan
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #072: Loyalty. Part of my Werewolf Threesome 'verse. The world around the boys is slowly growing bigger. Many thanks to [Leela](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Leela/pseuds/Leela) for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

This had been moved to [Forged in Flame](http://archiveofourown.org/works/732645/chapters/1361563), where I've reposted all the drabble-sets of this 'verse in chronological order and where I'll post any new drabble-sets that happen in the same 'verse.


	34. Pretending (Adam, Terrance, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam, Terrance
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #074: Comfort. This happens in the same 'verse as, and at some point after [Table for Two](http://glam-100.livejournal.com/196667.html). I'm really sorry for the angst. Many thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

Adam never expected this evening to be so frustrating. 

It was supposed to be fun, nothing but a little get together with some of the Zodiac family. He thought it would be an occasion to unwind and relax. He just completely forgot that it being a Zodiac thing meant that Brian would be invited too. 

It’s not the first time they got invited, separately, by the same friends. It’s never that surprising when it happens since they have so many friends in common. 

While Adam never finds it easy to pretend, it always seems like the right thing to do.

***

Here tonight, though, most people are the kind of friends who always had Adam’s back. This has always been the crowd who would accept things as they are, with whom he knows that he and Brian would barely have to tone things down. 

Instead, he’s stuck pretending that he hasn’t seen Brian in weeks, as if they didn’t spend most nights together, at either his or Brian’s place. 

Maybe that’s why he drinks more than he intended to. Because he has to act like everything he’s feeling, everything they are to each other doesn’t even exist. And it’s killing him. 

***

Adam’s not really drunk, but it gives him an excuse to go with the flow when, at the end of the evening, Terrance hooks an arm around Adam’s shoulders, saying, “Let me get you home, boo. You can’t go by yourself.”

Adam stays silent for the whole drive. He waits until they are curled around each other on Terrance’s couch. Even then, it takes Terrance asking, “How’s it going with your guy?”

All the air leaves Adam’s lungs in a rush. The words stick in his throat as he tries to get them out. “Not as well as I’d like.”

***

There’s a long silence before Terrance dares to ask, “It’s Brian, isn’t it?”

Adam’s left speechless as he tries to figure out what to reply and realizes that the last thing he wants is to lie. “How did you guess?” 

Terrance pulls him closer and Adam goes easily. “When Sutan asked me to keep an eye on you, he mentioned that he was thinking it might be someone we were working with. And tonight, whenever you thought no-one was watching you, you looked like someone just killed your puppy. I didn’t have such a hard time putting the pieces together.”

***

Adam sighs and burrows in Terrance’s embrace. He hears Terrance whisper in his ear, “Are you okay?”

“I wasn’t expecting tonight to be so hard.” He wasn’t expecting it to hurt that much. Everything is getting to him more every day. This is one of the most life-changing relationships he’s ever had, yet he has to hide it from everyone who matters to him. 

Even his mother, who’s always been his confidante, is out of the question. If he tells her anything, he knows at some point she’ll expect to meet Brian. And he’s only too aware it won’t happen.

***

“If it hurts you that much, why do you stay with him?” Terrance asks, softly, as if he’s expecting Adam to close himself off again and not say a thing.

Instead, Adam murmurs, “Because the good sides are too good.” He hesitates, then he keeps going before he can change his mind. “And because I was stupid enough to fall in love with him.”

His voice breaks because it’s the first time he dares to say it out loud, and suddenly, it makes it real. A single sentence that takes over everything and leaves him with no space to breathe. 

***

Now that the words are out, he can’t take them back, and they bring tears to his eyes, tears that he has no hope to stop. As if saying it out loud broke the dam and showed him how much he’s hurting, how much this whole relationship is breaking him a little more every week. 

Terrance tightens his grip around Adam, bringing him closer, murmuring soothing nonsense against Adam’s hair. Adam hides in the comfort of Terrance’s arms, and lets the tears come, full-body sobs making him shake.

It won’t solve anything, but just for tonight, it might be enough.


	35. Coming Home (Rick, G)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Rick
> 
> Content/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #075: Airport. Thanks to Aislinn for the preread.

They all wonder why Rick always grabs the earliest flight he can on the way back home.

It’s because of those moments. 

When he steps through the gate in LAX, exhausted, and hears the first delighted, high-pitched squeal. “Daddy!”

When he sees three small tornadoes run toward him at full speed and try to climb him like a tree. 

When he feels his youngest cling to his neck, gripping so tight he can barely breathe.

Because hearing his wife whisper, “Welcome home, honey,” as he tries to hug them all at once is worth all the exhaustion in the world.


	36. From Dreams to Reality (Adam/Brian, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: D/s
> 
> Written for prompt #077: Reunion. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

_My plane’s gonna be late. Don’t wait for me._

It’s early in the evening when Adam gets Brian’s text. Since he’s been expecting this moment for days, he doesn’t think before he replies. _I don’t mind waiting._

 _I do, baby. Don’t fuck up your sleep schedule because I’m late._

It’s unfair, is all Adam can think. It’s unfair because it’s been weeks of nothing but phone calls, skype calls and texts, nothing that comes close to having Brian at home with him. 

Thing is, they’d made plans that really didn’t include Adam going to bed alone and trying to sleep. 

***

The frustration has Adam complaining out loud. For a moment, he’s glad to be alone since it means he’s free to mumble all he wants about those “fucking airplanes that are always late” and how Brian should already be back home, _dammit._

He even glares at his phone. He’s a tiny bit annoyed by the fact that Brian’s first reaction, when he realized he’d be late, was to tell Adam not to wait up because he knew that otherwise, Adam would have.

Yet Adam doesn’t argue. Even though every letter is a pain to type, he sends back, _yes, sir._

***

_Good boy._

The praise makes Adam want to scream in frustration. He needs to hear those words, not just see them on a screen. He needs to feel the gentle touch that always accompanies them. 

Even though he knows it’s unrealistic to expect his band members not to have other gigs while he’s working on his next album, he sometimes wishes that he didn’t have to spend those stretches of time alone because Brian is touring with somebody else. 

It’s hard to think logically, to remember that it’s just a few more hours, when he’s itching to hit his knees.

***

He busies himself around the house. All that does is make time move slower.

He goes to sleep at a reasonable hour even though the bed feels bigger and emptier than it did on the nights before this one. 

He tosses and turns as the rest he needs evades him. Time passes, seconds turning into minutes turning into hours, but sleep still feels like a fantasy that’s beyond his reach.

Finally, when he’s caught somewhere between dreams and reality, he thinks maybe he imagined the sound of the front door opening and closing, of keys being dropped in the hall. 

***

It’s only when the bed dips under Brian’s weight, when he feels Brian’s arms closing around him, holding him tight, that Adam realizes he isn’t dreaming. 

He inches as near as he can, until there isn’t even a breath between them, and he feels more than he hears Brian’s, “Hey there, baby.”

His own, “Hi, Bri,” is sleepy and hesitant. A gentle kiss on his hair is all that’s necessary to draw, “Need you,” out of his mouth. 

He feels Brian’s breath on his skin and hears him laugh, softly. “What you need is sleep, baby. And so do I.”

***

Still Adam tries to get closer, even though there isn’t any space left to do so. 

“Feeling clingy?” Brian whispers. His grip tightens, and Adam breathes easier.

“I missed you. I need to make sure you’re really here.”

Adam didn’t mean to say that. It’s the kind of thing that goes straight from his brain to his mouth without any kind of filter because he’s only half awake. 

Yet Brian doesn’t seem to think it’s a bad thing. There’s a soft kiss on Adam’s neck, right beneath his ear, and a deep, “Don’t move,” in which the command is unmistakable. 

***

Time suspends its course as anticipation makes Adam dizzy. He barely has time to wonder. He feels another gentle kiss, then the kind of amazing pain that leaves him light-headed when Brian bites the junction of his neck and shoulder. 

Adam’s back arches, his breath catches in his throat. The frustration he felt earlier is nowhere in sight, everything forgotten but the hot prickle of tears in his eyes and the waves of blissful agony rolling through him.

Brian sucks the skin caught between his teeth, only letting go when Adam’s voice breaks, when he’s a wrecked, begging, sobbing mess. 

***

Adam barely has enough voice left to say, “Missed this,” and “Missed you so much.”

“I missed you too, you have no idea,” Brian murmurs, his breath a hot puff of air over Adam’s throat, sending shivers down Adam’s back. A kiss on the bruise Brian left behind gets another sobbing breath out of him. “I missed seeing my marks all over you.”

Without thinking, Adam tilts his head to the side, exposing his throat. “More, please.”

“Not tonight.” The words are soft enough not to feel like a rejection. “You’re half-asleep, boy, and I’m exhausted and jetlagged like crazy.”

***

Adam knows this, but he’s felt so lonely in the last couple of weeks, even through phone calls and texts, that he can’t help but ask, beg, “ _Please._ ”

“Tomorrow, baby.” Brian’s words feel like a caress over Adam’s skin. “Sleep for now. Tomorrow we’ll have all the time in the world. And I’ll give you exactly what you need.”

Adam burrows into the safety of Brian’s embrace and he falls asleep, holding onto the promise that Brian is back home and that he’ll spend the next couple of days reminding Adam of every way in which Adam belongs to him.


	37. The End? (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #078: to be continued... Thanks to Leela for the beta.

This has been moved to [A New Beginning](http://archiveofourown.org/works/784905/chapters/1480087), where I'll be posting all the drabble-sets to follow until I get to the end of this story.


	38. Tonight (Brian/Tommy, NC-17)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #079: Fire. This continues from last week drabble-set, [The End?](http://archiveofourown.org/works/269339/chapters/1397507). Many thanks to Leela for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

This has been moved to [A New Beginning](http://archiveofourown.org/works/784905/chapters/1480087), where I'll be posting all the drabble-sets to follow until I get to the end of this story.


	39. A Lack of Conviction (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #080: Dance party. Thanks to Leela for the beta.  
> This continues from last week drabble-set, Tonight. (Yes, this is turning into a ~thing. No, don't ask, I have no idea what's happening in my brain right now!)

This has been moved to [A New Beginning](http://archiveofourown.org/works/784905/chapters/1480087), where I'll be posting all the drabble-sets to follow until I get to the end of this story.


	40. Listening to Silence (Tommy/?, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Tommy/?
> 
> Contents/Warnings: D/s
> 
> Written for prompt #081: Obsession. Thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.  
> There was talk of tied-up Tommy on my feed earlier this week and well, the image was just too pretty to resist. Also, this is a case of, I had someone specific in mind but stayed as vague as possible, so Tommy's lover can be whoever you want it to be.

Tommy should still be sleeping. He would be, if it wasn’t for the sound of birds chirping right outside his window. 

Any other day, it wouldn’t bother him that much. Now, though, since he’s immobilized – held tight by the cuffs around his wrists and his lover’s embrace – and blinded – thanks to the sleeping mask over his eyes – the birds chirping is all he can hear, all he can focus on.

He obsesses over every little note and trill until he’s bright awake. Until he can’t help but twitch as the idea of more sleep fades in front of his eyes. 

***

“Stop squirming.” His sleepy voice, right in Tommy’s ear.

Tommy wishes it was that easy. “Fucking birds…”

“Shhhh. Go back to sleep.”

“Can’t. Too much noise.”

He hears another soft, deliberate, “Hush, pretty,” before the headphones from last night are back on his head, blocking all sound. A hand slips into his, squeezing his fingers. He squeezes back, once, twice. He’s good. Everything’s fine. 

Seconds later, the touch he was already missing is back, holding him close and tight, safe and protected. 

Tommy closes his eyes, snuggling in this little cocoon of love and blissful silence.

And he falls asleep.


	41. The Weight of Memories (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: References to canon character death (Tommy's father)
> 
> Written for prompt #081: Obsession. Thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.  
> This continues from last week drabble-set, [A Lack of Conviction](http://archiveofourown.org/works/269339/chapters/1431039).

This has been moved to [A New Beginning](http://archiveofourown.org/works/784905/chapters/1480087), where I'll be posting all the drabble-sets to follow until I get to the end of this story.


	42. A Foolish Hope (Adam, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam (references to Adam/Brian)
> 
> Content/Warnings: references to D/s
> 
> Written for prompt #086: Hope. This happens in the same 'verse as, and at some point after, [Table for Two](http://archiveofourown.org/works/269339/chapters/1210853) and [Pretending](http://archiveofourown.org/works/269339/chapters/1310018). Many thanks to @leela_cat for the beta.

They’ve reached a dead-end. 

Adam’s been aware of this for weeks now. No matter how strong and real he thinks what they have is, the words Brian spoke many months ago still hold true. 

_We’re friends. Don’t expect more than this._

Back then, Adam honestly thought it would be enough. That he could be content with having this space where he could let go and let himself be taken care of. 

It’s true that this thing they share got him through some pretty bad spots.

By now, though, he knows that he needs more than what Brian can give him. 

***

He needs someone who can be everything all at once. Someone he can introduce to his friends and family. Someone he can be affectionate with in public, without always having to second-guess himself. 

What he needs is someone who can be his friend, his lover, his partner, and his Dom. That someone can’t be Brian.

Adam knows it. He’s been aware of this for weeks now, the same way he knows that saying anything would bring their relationship to a screeching halt.

It hurts but he won’t breathe a word of it. 

Because even though it’s foolish, he’s still hoping.


	43. Blow Me Down (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #087: Suck and Blow. I'm blaming this [keek](https://www.keek.com/!gCb1cab) because seriously, this is their fault, not mine. Thanks to @aislinntlc for pre-reading.

When Brian’s done laughing, he calls out, “You know it would work better if you actually had an ass.”

“You suck,” Tommy replies as he comes back from the kitchen, beer in hand. 

“I might.” 

Tommy stops dead in his tracks, halfway through the room, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. “What?”

Brian’s gaze sweeps Tommy from head to toes. “Show me that dance move again, for real this time. If you make it good enough, I’ll suck you off.”

He smiles, innocently enough that Tommy could laugh it off if he wanted.

Instead, Tommy says, “Why not?”


	44. The Best Kind of Trouble (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy, Adam, Ashley
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #089: Shameless Boyz. So there was this [tweet](https://twitter.com/brianlondon/status/351178153793826817), and well, how was I supposed to resist? Many thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.

One moment, Tommy’s mock-fighting with Ashley. The next, he’s desperately trying to catch his whisky before it spills. 

“Shit!”

Tommy kneels to sop up the mess he made, but it’s already too late to do anything. 

“Please tell me that was your bag…” Ashley says as she bends over the arm of the couch.

Tommy’s glare is murderous. He wouldn’t be freaking out if he’d just spilled booze over his own things. Of course, with his luck, it had to be Brian’s instead.

“Again? Fuck, Tommy, if you want me to spank you that bad, you just have to ask.”

***

Tommy should be laughing it off. However, when he looks up at Brian standing next to him, the air between them turns heavy and Tommy can’t look away. 

It doesn’t last more than a second, but it’s enough to have Tommy biting his lip as his blood rushes south. Brian’s eyes darken with a newfound interest. 

Tommy finally shrugs with a half-serious, “Busted.” 

It’s enough to break the spell that settled over them. Enough to make Ashley laugh and Adam mutter, “You shameless boys.” 

But Tommy feels Brian’s gaze follow him all evening, a possibility that never existed before now. 

***

He waits and waits. Until everybody’s finally gone to bed. Until Adam walks out after looking from Tommy to Brian and back again. 

Tommy should follow him. The door of Brian’s room is still half-open behind Tommy. 

Instead, he asks, “Were you serious?”

“About?” 

“About spanking me.”

Brian’s smile is full of heat and dark promises. “Why don’t you stay and find out how serious I was?”

Tommy shivers, aware that if he stays, this will end with him over Brian’s knee, with his ass cherry red. 

Without looking away from Brian, he lets the door close behind his back.


	45. Reality (Ashley, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Ashley, Adam, Brian, Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: Terminal illness, death themes
> 
> Written for prompt #091: Labels. Many thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.

_Reality is just a label, a word to make people feel safe._

It’s Adam who says it first. Maybe that’s why Ashley doesn’t laugh in his face, the way she would have if Brian or Tommy had done the same. 

There’s something in how serious Adam looks that makes her pause and think. 

But she isn’t ready. She knows that in _reality_ , she’s dying. 

She believes him somehow. She believes that she could stay here and make music with them. Learn who she really is. 

Yet she shakes her head. “This isn’t real. I’m just dreaming.”

“If you say so.”

***

She wakes up to a small hand pressing a cold cloth to her forehead.

She tries to sit in her bed. Pain explodes in her lower back.

She can’t move. Again. 

“What happened?” She tries really hard to keep her voice steady.

Jen’s pitying look let her know that she failed. 

“You had a fever, Ashley.” 

Ashley nods. She can feel it now, in the tense muscles of her back and shoulder, in the shivers running through her body.

“Did you dream?” Jen asks, casually. Far too casually.

“Music.” And, because Jen is already frowning, she quickly adds, “Nothing important.”

***

She sees the lines disappear from Jen’s forehead and holds in a relieved sigh. If she’d said anything else, Jean would have been talking about upping her medication again. 

Ashley knows they’re not trying to heal her anymore. She’s dying. No one can stop it. But they seem intent on taking her dreams away from her, and right now, it’s the only thing that makes her want to keep going.

In her day to day life, it feels like she has nothing left. The visits from friends and family, with their fake, “you’ll get better soon,” only hurt her more. 

***

That night, after she falls asleep, she opens her eyes to find herself standing backstage with Tommy. She can hear the crowd, a low buzzing sound of conversation and screams. 

“Where are we?” She asks.

“Fantasy Springs.” Tommy takes her hand in his. “I wasn’t sure we’d be able to reach you again.”

“Why is that?”

“They’re trying to stop us.” 

Ashley shakes her head. “This isn’t real.”

“If you say so.” Tommy sighs but he doesn’t argue. “Let’s play.”

The show is electric and the energy from the crowd, incredible. It’s everything Ashley wishes for but can never have. 

***

The fever is gone, and Ashley’s feeling a little better. She knows it’s an illusion, but once Jen finally leave her alone, it’s enough to get her out of bed. 

She rummages through her closet until she finds her bass. 

When she tries to play, her fingers tremble so much on the strings, she can’t even pluck the way she used to. 

“Dammit!” She has to hold in a sob as she hit her bass with her open palm. She wants her music back so much…

By the time Jen comes back, Ashley’s bass is hidden in her closet again. 

***

She’s in Brian’s hotel room. Everybody has gone to bed. She should have left when Tommy did, but she was too comfortable here, lying on Brian’s bed, with his hands playing with her hair. 

“I should go,” she says, softly. 

“Why don’t you stay?”

It takes her a minute to realize that Brian doesn’t mean here, with him. He means _here_ , with them.

“This isn’t real.”

The more she says those words, the less she believes them. 

“Reality is just a label.”

Ashley recognizes Adam’s words in Brian’s mouth. She doesn’t understand how her dreams can make so much sense. 

***

“It’s just a dream.” She has to say it. It would be too easy to believe this isn’t some wicked world made up by her feverish mind. 

“Look at me.”

She rolls on her back to watch him, lying on his side, raised on one elbow. He brings his hand to the strip of skin showing between her shirt and her leggings, and he pinches. _Hard_.

Her back arches, she sucks in a breath. Brian doesn’t release her until she’s literally sobbing from pain. 

“If it was a dream, you’d be waking up now, or you wouldn’t have felt anything.”

***

When she opens her eyes, she pulls up her night shirt and stares. Low on her hip, there’s a small, purplish bruise, right in the spot where Brian pinched her.

She brings her hand to the bruise and presses down. A fresh wave of pain washes over her, letting her know that the bruise is brand new, and not just the remnants of one of those times when she hurts herself without noticing.

When she lifts her fingers from her skin, she’s out of breath, tempted to press the bruise again. She hasn’t felt this alive in far too long.

***

She walks the few steps from her bed to her balcony. It’s the kind of cloudy day when rain always threatens but never falls. 

She sits with a book in her lap. She doesn’t try to read, aware that after only a couple of lines, her vision will blur and her eyes will sting. Reading isn’t something she can enjoy anymore. 

There’s very little in her everyday life that she actually likes. Every little thing that matters has been taken away from her. 

Sometimes she wonders why they don’t help her die. It would be so much easier for everyone. 

***

It’s Adam who asks her next. “Stay.”

They’re in South Africa. They went on a safari and then on a bicycle ride. They’re playing two shows. This is the most fun Ashley’s had in a long time. 

This is when she realizes that it all makes too much sense. That a dream can’t keep going like this, for months, like her mind is trying to see the story to the end. 

So she asks, “What are you?”

Adam shakes his head. “You’re asking the wrong question, Ashley. It doesn’t matter what we are. What really matters is what _you_ are.”

***

When her father visits her, she’s tempted to tell him about the dreams, about the music. She knows he would tell her, like he did months ago, that her dreams aren’t real. 

That she should talk to her doctor about them, that they aren’t good for her. 

They’ve already had this conversation, back when Ashley still had the energy for it. She remembers screaming herself hoarse and how angry her father was. 

The last thing she wants is a fight, yet she’s tempted to tell him.

Just to see his face when she replies, “Reality is nothing but a label.”

***

They’re all enjoying the sun in Bali when she looks at Adam and asks, “You said this was about me. What am I, then?”

“A Wanderer,” Adam says, smiling like he’s proud of her. “Someone who can slip into other’s dreams and shape them.”

Ashley shakes her head. It sounds a little too perfect. “But I’m the one dreaming.”

“We had no other way to reach you. They’re still doing their best to keep us out.”

She can’t help but say, “They’re just trying to help me get better.”

“No. They’re trying to kill everything in you that isn’t human.”

***

_If they do that, there will be nothing left of you._

Adam’s last words follow her as she wakes up. There is so little left of her already.

She’s lost her family, her friends. She’s lost her music. She’s lost every little thing that mattered. 

Maybe she shouldn’t trust her dreams, but Adam, Tommy and Brian have been the only constant, the only good thing in her life in far too long. 

She needs to believe in something, even if it’s a dream.

Reality is nothing but a word, a label. It can be whatever she wants it to be.

***

“Where are we?” She asks once they’ve taken and tweeted the band picture. 

“Asia,” Brian says. “We’re touring.” 

Slowly, like even she can’t believe what’s in her head, she asks, “How do I stay?” 

He smiles. “You let your human body die.”

Fear nearly swallows her whole. If this is just a dream, nothing but a way for her mind to make the horror of what’s happening to her tolerable, it means she won’t wake up tomorrow morning. 

But she knows that refusing would only delay the inevitable.

She takes the hand Brian offers, and says, “Show me how. Please.”


	46. Remembering How to Breathe (Adam/Tommy, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: Anxiety/panic attack
> 
> Written for prompt #093: Air. Many thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.

The feeling hits Tommy when he’s half-way through the line. 

One minute, he’s signing and taking pictures with fans. The next, he’s covered in sweat and his heart is beating a thousand miles a minute. 

_No_. Not here, not now. 

He pushes through, doing his best to ignore the panic climbing with each step he takes, with each shaky breath that doesn’t quite make it into his lungs. 

The relief he should feel when he takes the last picture and gets on the bus is nowhere in sight. Instead, he loses all control over his breathing and he gets dizzy.

***

Tommy could cry if he wasn’t so scared. It’s been months since the last attack and he honestly thought he was doing better. 

He grabs onto the side of his bunk in a desperate attempt to get himself under control. The more he tries, though, the less air seems to make it into his body. 

He’s breathing fast, too fast, and feeling dizzier with each sharp intake of breath that only makes everything worse instead of helping. 

“Tommy, you okay?” 

Allison is standing a little too close, the fear so clear in her voice that it ratchets up Tommy’s guilt. 

***

He tries to say something and fails, words dying on his tongue because he doesn’t have enough air to carry them. 

“Move, Allie.”

It’s only when Adam steps in behind Tommy that Tommy realizes who said that. Adam is the only who would dare get this close to him when he’s like this – but it’s never been that bad, not once in all their months of touring. 

He’s the only one whose presence won’t make Tommy lash out in a flurry of half-whispered “I’m alright” and “Leave me alone.”

The only one with whom Tommy feels safe instead of threatened. 

***

Adam presses his front against Tommy’s back, covers Tommy’s hands with his, spreads his legs so he can place his feet on either side of Tommy’s, caging him in from all sides. 

“Breathe, Tommy.”

Tommy tries, he fucking tries, but air still comes in hiccupping breath, in and out too fast.

“ _I can’t._ ”

“Yes, you can.” Adam brushes a kiss against Tommy’s hair. “Breathe with me, baby.” 

Tommy shakes his head. The more he tries, the more it hurts, the more scared he becomes. 

“Just focus on me. And breathe.” 

Adam’s low whisper slowly drowns the noise in Tommy’s head.

***

“Follow my rhythm, Tommy Joe.”

Adam’s voice feels like a lifeline, the only thing keeping Tommy’s head above the water. He grabs onto it with all of his will. 

He feels Adam’s deep breath in his whole body as Adam says, “In. And out.”

Tommy lets the rise and fall of Adam’s chest against his back carry him to safety as the first long drag of air makes it into his lungs. The panic goes down a notch. He can finally breathe.

It takes ten deep breaths, ten sets of _in, and out_ , before Tommy sags against Adam’s chest, exhausted. 

***

Adam releases Tommy’s hands but never stops touching him. Adam trails his hands along the length of Tommy’s arms, his shoulders, his back, until Tommy turns around and hides his face in Adam’s neck. 

Adam pulls him closer as Tommy shakes out his tears and fear, his body wrecked by silent sobs that no one will hear but that he knows Adam can feel. 

There’s a whisper of soothing nonsense on the side of his head, but Adam lets him cling as long as he wants. Adam’s ready and willing, once again, to be whatever it is that Tommy needs. 

***

When he finally stops crying long enough to unclench his hands from Adam’s shirt, he thinks that he should take a step back and put a little distance between them.

He doesn’t get the chance. The thought barely has the time to cross his mind.

“Can you walk?”

Tommy blinks. His mind always feels slower in the aftermath of an anxiety attack. “Walk where?”

“My room.”

Tommy wants to protest, but everything in Adam’s attitude makes it clear he won’t take no for an answer. If Tommy says he can’t walk, he wouldn’t put it past Adam to carry him.

***

There’s a limit to how vulnerable he’s willing to appear, and to whom. So even though his legs won’t carry him far, he says, “I can walk.” 

Since it’s only Tommy’s damned pride talking, he accepts the arm Adam keeps around his waist and leans most of his weight on Adam. 

In Adam’s room, he lets Adam strip them both to their underwear. He follows Adam’s lead and he sighs in pleasure as Adam washes away the remains of sweat and make-up off of his face, the kind touch of Adam’s fingers leaving him soft and pliant in Adam’s arms. 

***

Once Adam is done, Tommy keeps his eyes closed, afraid that, as soon as he opens them, the little bit of peace he’s found will slip through his fingers. 

He lets Adam pull him onto the bed and under the covers. 

As soon as they stop touching, the bed feels too wide. Tommy pulls Adam against him until Adam rolls on top of him, bracketing him with his arms and legs, Adam’s weight holding him against the bed, Adam’s body surrounding him from all sides. 

Until, in the cocoon of safety Adam can always create for him, Tommy falls asleep.


	47. Music Spirit (Ashley/Tommy, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Ashley/Tommy
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #097: Spirit. Many thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.

Realizing that Tommy can see her surprises Ashley so much that she messes up a song for the first time in years. 

She’s used to people hearing her and wondering where the music is coming from. She feels safe in the shadows, where she can influence the mood of a room without anyone paying attention to her. 

Tommy, however, is staring at her. Not just a point on the wall behind her, like he has a vague idea where the music is coming from but no clear feeling; he’s watching her fingers move over the strings and smiling at her.

***

It takes her a couple of seconds to start playing again. 

She acts as if she has no knowledge of the way Tommy can’t tear his gaze away from her and she ignores him as best as she can. She’s relieved when he doesn’t approach her. The fact that his name comes to her so easily as soon as he enters the bar is enough to leave her unsteady on her feet. Trying to talk to him would make everything worse. She just isn’t ready.

One more time, she allows herself to hide behind the safe curtain her music offers. 

***

She expects that evening to be an anomaly, no more than a blip on the radar, soon forgotten. 

Instead, Tommy’s back every night. He sits at a little table by himself, sipping his whisky and watching her. 

She lets him. She can’t tell him not to come back, not without acknowledging that she knows he’s there. And she’s learned over the years that the best way to deal with humans, especially nosy ones, is not to deal with them. 

So she acts as if the music is all that matters, as it should be. As if she doesn’t notice him. 

***

There’s no doubt that, after a couple of nights, Tommy will lose whatever fascination he has with her and leave.

Tommy surprises her again when, one evening, he drains his whisky and walks up to her. 

“Who are you?”

She doesn’t mean to answer him, yet she does. “I’m Ashley.”

“Am I the only one who can see you?”

Being a musical spirit means that music is so much easier for her to comprehend than words are. She gives a small nod.

“Why is that?”

She hesitates. She wonders about Tommy, as she does with everyone who can see her. 

***

But she doesn’t know the answer. Most people who can see her recognize her for what she is because they’ve already seen spirits or fairies before in their lives. Because of that, they stay as far away from her as they can, and she never sees them again after that first evening. 

And if Tommy knew what she is, he wouldn’t be asking. 

“Do you believe?” She asks on a whim, elaborating when Tommy stares at her, looking lost. “In magic. Or spirits. Or… you know. Those things people believe in.”

He shrugs. “I believe in music. That’s about it.”

***

She remembers what she’d been told before she crossed the frontier between their two worlds. To stay away from humans who don’t believe because you never know how it will go. If you’re lucky, you’ll find someone who’s incredibly sensitive to magic because there’s nothing shielding them from it beyond their own will. If you’re unlucky…

They never told her what happens if you’re unlucky. But she thinks that whatever they meant to warn her away from wasn’t Tommy. 

“It might be why you can see me. I am music.”

And she’s nothing without music, but she won’t say that.

***

Tommy smiles. “That’s what I think sometimes…” He trails off, staring at her like he’s seeing her for the first time. “You really mean that, don’t you?”

She nods. “Music feeds me. It keeps me alive. I couldn’t live without it.” 

“What are you?”

“You won’t believe me if I tell you.”

When Tommy walks away from her that night, Ashley expects never to see him again. She refuses to acknowledge the unexpected pang of longing the thought causes. She’s being ridiculous. Getting attached to a human, to someone who will eventually die, is the worst thing she could do.

***

Tommy comes back, though. Night after night. It makes Ashley happy to see him again. Happy enough to send a smile his way once he’s settled at his table. She feels warm all over when he smiles back. 

She realizes that she enjoys the way he looks at her, like she’s some kind of puzzle that he wants to try and decipher. 

One night, he approaches her again. “What song was that? I didn’t recognize it.”

She tries to figure out a way to say it, then shakes her head. “There isn’t a word for this, not in your language.”

***

“Tell me anyway. Please?” He takes her hand in his and she doesn’t want to pull away, even though it feels so strange to have his warm fingers encircle hers. 

When she says the word, she watches Tommy frown. She expects him to call her out on speaking nonsense words or rubbish instead of the knowledge he’s asked for.

That’s the way humans like him always react, in all the stories she’s been told before.

Instead, he asks, again, “What are you?”

She can’t help but smile at how stubborn he can be. 

“I’m something that you don’t believe in.”

***

Every time, she thinks that Tommy won’t come back. Every time, he does. 

They share secretive smiles. Once, he even brings his guitar. He still has no idea what song she’s playing, but he follows her lead as best as he can. She loves the little harmonies they come up with, like Tommy’s answering to something deep within her soul. They can talk without saying a word. 

That always feels safer, because she always thought that music didn’t give away that much about her. Now she realizes that, with someone who understands that language, it can.

Yet she doesn’t mind.

***

One evening, Tommy waits until the bar is about to close before he comes to sit right next to her.

“Do you always play here?”

Ashley nods. She’s used to the place, and the place is used to her. The little bar feels like an old friend. 

“Why?”

“It’s easier to hide in plain sight, to disappear in a crowd.”

“Don’t you want to be seen?”

A few weeks ago, the answer would have been easy. Today, she needs to really think about it. 

“I don’t know.”

Again, Tommy takes her hand, traces little circles on it with his thumb.

***

That simple sensation makes it hard to focus. 

“The guy I play for,” Tommy says. “Adam. He’s looking for a bassist. I think you’d be a good fit.”

She should be telling him that she doesn’t play bass, even though her instrument looks like one. Once upon a time, she might have. Today, she’s thinking that she would love to learn.

Still, she has to remind him, “I’m not human, Tommy. Haven’t you figured that out by now?”

“I don’t care. Neither will Adam.” 

She isn’t human, but it might be fun to pretend for a while. 

So she agrees.


	48. Caught in a Web of Lies (Ashley, Tommy, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing / Characters: Ashley, Tommy
> 
> Contents / Warnings: Slavery AU
> 
> Written for prompt #100: Pick Your Own Adam Song Lyric. Thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.  
> I know this is a tease and I'm sorry. This is a 'verse that appeared fully grown in my head and there is much more to it than this little drabble-set, but I have no idea when I'll have the time to write it.

When Ashley enters the room, the boy seems to try to shrink into himself. She wonders what happened to him to make him so scared. She has a feeling that, even if she were to ask, he wouldn’t tell her. There’s a web of lies around the boy, of the kind that she has no hope to unravel unless he lets her. But she promised to try. 

So she walks up to him and holds out the plate. “Are you hungry? I have some food for you.” 

He starts shaking his head before his stomach rumbles in hunger, contradicting him. 

***

He blushes to the very root of his hair. “Maybe a little.”

“Here.”

She sits on the mattress by his side while he eats, careful to keep a little distance between them. She doesn’t think he’s stupid enough to try and reach for her knife, but she likes to be prepared. And she’s pretty sure that sitting too close to him would make him even more skittish. 

“Can I ask for your name?”

“Do I still have one?”

She arches an eyebrow at him as she waits. As if she needed another reminder that the boy is anything but willing. 

***

“Unless someone told you otherwise…” She lets her words hang in the air, and something akin to panic washes over the boy’s face. 

“Of course not.” Another lie, Ashley knows it. “I’m Tommy.” 

When Tommy’s done eating, she hands him a glass of water. “I’m Ashley. I’m going to show you around the place, see if there’s something you can make yourself useful at.”

“But I thought… I’m…” Tommy trails off, like just saying the word would be too much for him. Another hint. Willing slaves are never scared to identify themselves as such. It’s part of who they are. 

***

Ashley sighs. The more they talk, the more it feels like she’ll be lucky if she can get Tommy to trust her enough to tell her how the hell Marcus tricked him into this. Well, she probably could, but it would take weeks of talking and getting to know each other. Problem is, they don’t have weeks. Not if they want to help Tommy out of whatever shit Marcus has him in. 

“My partners have doubts about you.” She carefully keeps herself out of that sentence, even though she agrees with them. “We won’t start training you until we’re sure.”

***

“What do you mean?”

“We don’t take in the unwilling.” Just from the look on his face, she can see that he doesn’t believe her. “Most of our charges don’t even end up on the market. They already have an arrangement with someone and they just needed the right amount of training.” She shrugs. “Nobody wants a broken bed slave. If they do, they’re not the kind of people we do business with.”

“But I am.” She watches him swallow and knows that he’s lying again. “Willing.”

She doesn’t call him out on it. She feels like it wouldn’t help.

***

She’s tempted to tell him that she’s seen the vids of him. That’s she’s seen him trying to get away from every touch, from anything that was done to him. That the fact that he could get hard through it doesn’t prove anything. Not when the rest of his body language showed that he was fighting with all of his will. 

She doesn’t. She’s also going to recommend that he isn’t allowed to interact with their other charges just yet. Tommy’s so intent on pretending that he would use any way he can find to convince them that he’s willing.

***

She wonders what happened to him to convince him that it was worth it. Anyone who knows what they’re looking for could see he obviously doesn’t want to be a slave. Yet here he is, trying his hardest to pretend the opposite. 

“Putting someone through training if they’re unwilling would destroy our rep.” Marcus knows that. Ashley would bet anything it’s the exact reason why he wanted them to take in Tommy. “We’re not going to risk that until we’re sure.”

She doesn’t say that they already are sure, that they’re just trying to get the truth out of Tommy.

***

She still stands by what she told Adam and Brian when they first showed her Tommy’s vids: all they can hope to get out of him is a nasty Stockholm syndrome. Not a willing bed slave. 

“What will it take for you to be sure?”

She smiles at how stubborn he is. She’s sure he knows that she won’t answer that. He has a long way to go if he wants to fool them and they’re not going to help him.

“You’ll see,” is all she dares to say. “Come on. Let’s find out if you can be useful somewhere.” 

***

“You know,” she says as they walk farther into the building, “whatever Marcus has on you to force you to lie to us, we could help you out of it. We want him out of our hair. If we can kill two birds with one stone...”

Tommy shakes his head. “I’m not lying.”

Ashley sighs. She understands why Adam decided to take Tommy in. She has a good idea what kind of fake ‘trainer’ Marcus would have set Tommy with if they’d said no.

Right now, though, she wonders if Tommy will be more trouble for them than anything else.


	49. A Battle of Wills (Adam/Brian, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: D/s
> 
> Written for prompt #101: Strange Battles. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

Brian has no idea how long he’s been listening to Adam going on and on and on. He’s leaning against the wall, arms crossed as Adam paces around the room. He knows that Adam’s pushing for a fight. Another day, Brian might have taken the bait. He’s done it before, at times when he could be sure that what Adam needed was to have that attitude fucked or beaten out of him, and that he, himself was in a state where he could give that to him. 

Not today, though. Not when he can see how badly Adam’s been hurt. 

***

He knows that, to Adam, this feels like another betrayal. The knowledge that his former label might have not put all the effort they could into making Trespassing a success once it was recorded is a cruel reminder of all the people, over the years, who believed that Adam couldn’t succeed the way he has. He can hear it in the way Adam stumbles over his words, the way his voice cracks now and then. 

He waits, with all the patience he can muster, until Adam seems to have run out of words. Then he asks, “You done yet, boy?”

***

Brian expects Adam to start ranting again. Instead, the fight seeps out of him and he nearly collapses on the couch. That’s all the confirmation Brian needs to be sure he’s making the right choice.

Adam rests his forearms on his thighs, lets his head drop forward. “I don’t know.” 

Slowly, Brian walks over to him, going to stand behind the couch and lay his hand on the back of Adam’s neck. “Let me help you.” He isn’t asking, not really, not here and now. But he’s aware that just one word that’s too harsh could make Adam break down. 

***

He feels Adam lean into his touch with a, “ _please_ , sir,” that sounds like it’s being torn out of him. 

“Bedroom, baby.” 

Adam jerks, throwing a questioning look at Brian, but Brian doesn’t add a word. Giving Adam room to argue won’t help. 

They stare at each other for maybe a minute before Adam sighs. “Yes, sir.” 

As Brian watches Adam walk away, he grabs onto the back of the couch and takes a couple of deep breaths. He’s giving Adam time to settle and making sure that he, himself, is as grounded and as solid as he can be.

***

When he enters the bedroom, he finds Adam naked and kneeling on their bed. One quick glance confirms that those of Adam’s clothes that needed to be put away immediately have been. The rest are properly folded on the chair beside the bed. Brian allows himself a small smile. He’s glad that Adam isn’t making this harder than it has to be. 

“Lie down on your front.”

He can practically feel Adam’s hesitation. He knows that Adam’s still expecting, _wanting_ to be punished for his outburst, that that’s the exact reason why he did it. But tonight, it won’t help. 

***

Instead, he grabs the soft blanket that he always find Adam wrapped in when things start going wrong and Adam doesn’t know where to look for comfort, and he lays it over Adam. Afterward, he straddles Adam’s hips, rests his weight over Adam’s back, follows the length of Adam’s arms over his head with his and links their fingers together. 

He drops his voice to a whisper. “Breathe with me, baby. Just breathe.” 

Adam twitches and Brian can practically hear the fight going on in Adam’s mind. He knows this isn’t what Adam wanted nor what he was ready for. 

***

This is one of those moments when so many things are out of Adam’s control that he can’t help but turn this into another struggle. 

Today, though, instead of forcefully taking control as Adam is expecting him to, Brian knows it’s better for both of them to wait things out.

After giving Adam a moment to find his ground, he says, with just the right hint of authority, “Breathe, Adam. Breathe with me.”

There’s another hesitation, then he can _feel_ the moment when Adam stops thinking and follows Brian’s rhythm, focusing only on breathing and this moment, here and now. 

***

He waits until he’s sure that Adam’s whole world has narrowed down to him, his body, his voice. Then he brushes a soft kiss on Adam’s shoulder. “I’m right here, Adam. I’m not going anywhere. Let it out.”

It’s a testament to how close Adam is to falling apart that that’s all it takes for the first sob to be ripped out of his throat. 

Brian moves, just enough to let Adam turn around, to let Adam cling to him. He feels Adam’s tears wetting his neck and shirt, and pulls him closer, never once stopping murmuring nonsense and encouragement. 

***

He keeps talking as he traces soft, slow circles on Adam’s back, holding Adam for as long as he needs to cry out his feelings of betrayal and shame and, somehow, of not being good enough.

He knows that Adam barely hears him. His words are nothing but a reminder that here, it’s okay to let go. And that, together, they can reduce the outside world to a background noise because they’ll always be each other’s safe place. 

Even when it turns into this strange battle of wills because there’s a world between what Adam wants and what he needs.


	50. First Impression (Ashley/Brian, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Ashley/Brian
> 
> Contents/Warnings: Werewolf AU
> 
> Written for prompt #103: Feathers and Fur. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.  
> This is another story in my [Werewolf Threesome 'Verse](http://archiveofourown.org/series/51372), but it happens years before everything else. Because apparently, there are some universes that will never let me go.

Whatever Ashley was expecting, it wasn’t this. 

It could have been a night like any other, going out drinking and dancing with her older sister and other members of their pack. Then, later, going for a run. 

She was doing her best to enjoy every moment she could spend with her pack, all too aware that the day she finally found her mate would also be the day she would have to walk away. Not because her pack would turn its back on her, but because everyone knew that the only possible mate for a dominant female was an alpha. 

***

She was completely unprepared for this. Every member of her family kept telling her that she was special, precious. That one day, she would finally meet the one were that made even her dominant wolf want to submit, and that she would bring them pride because that were could only be an alpha. 

She waited and waited. But it never happened. 

Instead, that night, she felt something in the air. Just the hint of a scent, seductive and powerful. It took her mere seconds to figure out who it was coming from. A newcomer. An outsider, dark skinned and gorgeous. 

***

Somehow, she couldn’t tear her eyes away from him. 

Seconds into what felt more and more like a staring contest, she realized that he was a beta. She raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to acknowledge her as his equal and to lose interest.

What surprised her was her wolf’s reaction. How it kept standing its ground, waiting, expecting something that Ashley couldn’t understand because it didn’t make any sense. 

At least until she caught a name, as if it had been thrown across the room. _Brian._

Her breath caught when she realized that he’d just opened himself to her.

***

Not like he was recognizing an equal but someone higher in the hierarchy. 

Her wolf was still waiting, patiently, and Ashley herself was curious. She had no idea where this was leading. 

Until the sight of Brian dropping his gaze to the ground, tilting his head and baring his throat, hit her like a ton of bricks. 

She knew, then, that her family had been right about one thing: her life would change on the day she met her mate. 

But she knew that what they had meant had nothing in common with the possessive urge taking hold of her. 

***

And nothing in common with her wolf’s roar of _mine_ , so strong that she had to hold onto the counter in front of her in order not to stalk across the room and lay her claim on him. 

She’d thought about it, of course, but it always felt like a fantasy. She was well aware that most submissive beta males were part of same-sex couples. 

As she stared at Brian, she realized that they were more than compatible. He was the rare kind of were who could submit to her without thinking it made him any less of a male. 

***

It was such a bad idea. Wrong and forbidden. Her family would turn their backs on her. Her pack would… She didn’t even want to imagine what her pack would do to them. 

The smart thing would have been to let him walk away and disappear into the night, back where he came from, before anything could happen between them. 

But how could she, when it felt like her wolf had been waiting for him her whole life?

So, when it became clear that she wasn’t going to move and he left the bar, she went looking for her sister. 

***

“I’m not feeling good, Mel. I think I’ll go home.”

Mel pressed a gentle hand against Ashley’s forehead. “You’re burning up. Do you want me to come with you?”

Ashley shook her head. “Stay. Don’t let your night be ruined because of me. I’ll be fine.”

“Be careful, baby girl.”

The pet name made Ashley smile and almost feel guilty about lying. “I always am.”

She walked out and caught a glimpse of dark fur. Brian had waited for her.

The urge was so strong that she didn’t give a damn about the consequences. She shifted and ran after Brian.


	51. Spiritual (Tommy, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Tommy, Adam
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #104: Oktoberfest. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

Every year, Tommy can feel the veil between this world and the next grow thinner all through October. 

He’s been told that it’s because he was born in October. He doesn’t know if that’s true and he doesn’t care. 

He knows, however, that pretending not to believe is the only thing protecting him. In part because it lets him avoid the kind of crowd who think Ouija boards are toys and who don’t understand how dangerous it is to summon a spirit.

For years, Tommy believed a ghost could do nothing but run amok. 

Until the day he met Adam.


	52. Days and Nights (Adam/Terrance, R)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Terrance
> 
> Contents/Warnings: None
> 
> Written for prompt #105: Riding. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

There are days when Adam hates the whole protective thing all of his friends have had going on since his last break-up. Days when he wants to scream at them that it’s been months and he can handle this, dammit. 

But there are moments when it gets to be too much. Nights when he’s glad that one of them sticks to his side and makes sure that he gets home in one piece, no matter how drunk he is. 

Nights when being reminded not to fall asleep in the shower and replying, “It only happened once,” just makes him laugh.

***

Nights when the heat of another person in his bed, someone familiar who understands all of him and never judges him, is all that’s necessary for Adam to feel safe and grounded. 

Nights when he never tries to gain the upper hand because there are people in his life that he trusts that much. 

Nights when he loses himself in gentles touches and sweet kisses. 

Nights when the sight and feeling of Terrance riding his dick is almost too perfect.

And in those moments, that easy, I’ll always be there for you kind of friendship, is all that Adam needs.


	53. Invitation (Adam/Brian, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/characters: Adam/Brian
> 
> Content/Warnings: Vampires
> 
> Written for prompt #106: Invitation. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This happens in the same 'verse and prior to my [GRBB story](http://archiveofourown.org/works/727210/chapters/1349797), but it can stand on its own.

“Who invited you?”

Adam is at a loss for words. He knows who it was, of course. He’s seen the guy in the audience while he was singing, far too often for it to be a coincidence. But they’ve never spoken. He doesn’t even know the guy’s name. 

So he hands the woman at the door the invitation he found in his dressing room one night after a show, and he admits, “I don’t know.” 

The chicken scrawl must be familiar to her. She stares at it, incredulous. “If you don’t know who he is, you can still walk away.”

***

“Why does it sound like you’re trying to convince me?”

“Because if it’s only curiosity that brought you here, then you shouldn’t be here.”

Adam shrugs. “I don’t need a stranger to try and protect me.”

Her voice hardens, and Adam sees a flash of fangs. “I’m trying to protect him. Not you.”

Somehow, Adam believes her. “It’s not just curiosity.”

“Why are you here, then?”

This isn’t something he’s told anyone yet, but if he wants her to let him in, he feels like he has to. “I don’t remember what happened the night I found this. Not entirely.”

***

“But ever since? I’ve been hearing music coming out of nowhere. And I know it’s linked to this.” Soft notes from a piano. Music that he doesn’t quite recognize but that he’s tempted to try and sing along to. 

She stares at him long enough to make him uncomfortable, as if she’s seeing something in him that he doesn’t understand. Then, she finally moves to let him walk through the door. “Go ahead.”

It’s his first time here, but somehow he knows exactly where he’s going. He makes his way across the dance floor as if everybody else doesn’t exist.

***

Music pulses through him, getting stronger every second, but it has nothing to do with the actual beat playing in the club. 

He ends up sitting on a couch in a small alcove at the back of the club. He barely has to wait a minute before a shadow appears in the entrance, blocking the light. “I was wondering if I’d see you here tonight.”

Adam sucks in a breath as Brian lets the curtain close behind him. Music takes over everything until he can’t think, can’t move, can barely breathe. He throws his head back in a silent scream. 

***

Music is everywhere, pulling him in until he has nowhere left to go. Until it feels like nothing could shatter this world he’s lost in. 

Then he feels a hand against his throat, a forehead against his, a whisper against his lips. “Let me in.”

The small points of contacts bring Adam’s feet back to the ground. It’s easy after that, to do as Brian says and open himself more, until he’d swear that he can hear his own voice even though he isn’t singing. 

Until he’s so far gone that it feels like their music is part of him.

***

There are tears at the corners of Adam’s eyes but the fear is gone. He knows it’s a trick, just like he knows that he’s putting himself in more danger with every step he takes. But it’s too easy to pretend he’s safe here.

“Stubborn boy,” Brian whispers. “Why did you wait so long to come to me?”

“Because I had no idea what would happen.” And he still doesn’t know. “Are you going to kill me?”

“No. Not after going to so much trouble to make you mine.”

It should be enough, Adam knows that. But it can’t be. 

***

“And after tonight?”

“What happens after tonight will depend on you.”

Adam has a hard time believing it. He’s vaguely aware that he should be scared. That he should go away while he still can. That he should have listened to the woman at the door and forgotten everything. 

But he can’t. Not when it feels so right and everything else doesn’t quite satisfy him anymore. 

Now that the music isn’t uncontrollable, memories are coming back to him. Of the other night and everything they talked about. Of the reasons why Brian left only the invitation behind before he disappeared.

***

With the memories comes the knowledge that, even though it doesn’t feel like it now, this was Adam’s choice. That conviction is strong enough that Adam decides to ignore the small voice telling him that it could be just another trick, that he’ll lose himself if he isn’t careful. 

It’s too late for that. He lost himself the moment when he noticed Brian in the audience, that very first night. 

Even facing the possibility of starting over, he would make the same choice all over again. 

So he closes his eyes and tilts his head, offering himself to Brian’s bite.


	54. Childhood Dreams (Adam/Tommy, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Tommy
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #109: Memories. Thanks to Leela for the beta.

The ‘house’ in the woods is just as Tommy remembers it. There’s dust everywhere, but otherwise, nothing has changed. The child-sized furniture, the handful of pillows in a corner, the ‘stage’ with its fake instruments, everything looks like the kids Tommy and Adam once were just ran out and the house is waiting for them to come back. 

Tommy sits on a small chair, trailing his fingers across the table. He’s getting ready to move out tomorrow, but since everything is packed, he’s hiding here instead of spending the evening with his family.

Just like he did before Adam moved. 

***

They were half-way through their teenage years but thinking themselves grown-up. The little house in the woods was already just a memory. They were now playing music for real, in badly soundproofed garages and basements, while dreaming of so much more. 

Then the dreams of making it together came crashing down when Adam’s father got a contract in California and his family moved there. 

There was a party, because when Adam was involved, there always needed to be a party. Tommy went, trying to be a good friend until the end. The last evening, he hid in their wood house.

***

“I had a feeling I’d find you here.”

He was sitting with his guitar in his lap, not even trying to turn the sound he was pulling out of it into music when Adam’s voice had made him look up.

“Shouldn’t you be packing or something?”

“I’m all done.” Adam shrugged and joined Tommy on the floor. “Mom would have killed me if I’d waited too long.”

Tommy laughed at that. He had no doubt it was true. For a person her size, Adam’s mom could be very scary when she wanted to. 

“What are you doing here?” he asked. 

***

“I wanted to see you before we left. And since you’ve been so good at avoiding me, I had a feeling you wouldn’t come to my house before we left tomorrow.”

“I’m sorry.” Tommy was looking right over Adam’s shoulder. He felt like a shitty friend, but having to fake being happy while watching his best friend move to another state would have hurt too much. 

“Stop that. I agree with you. It sucks.”

Tommy rolled his eyes. “Don’t try to make me feel better. What about all the opportunities you’ll have? You’ve wanted to move there your whole life.”

***

“You’re right,” Adam admitted, “But I was good with waiting for us to go to college. I wanted us to have all those opportunities together. You know that.”

Tommy’s heart did a ridiculous little flip in his chest at Adam’s words. As if _us_ could have meant more than just them being best friends. 

But he didn’t say anything about it. There was no point, not with Adam’s family moving the next day.

“Well, since it won’t happen, you’ll just have to become a superstar and live the dream for me.”

Adam frowned and grabbed Tommy’s hand. “It will happen.”

***

Tommy shook his head and tried to take his hand away, but Adam didn’t let go. 

“It will happen,” Adam said again. “Maybe ten years, fifteen years from now? We’ll be on a stage together, and everyone will know our names. I promise you.”

And, just because Adam so obviously believed it would come true, Tommy had to believe him too.

Of course, they lost contact over the years. If Adam is living his dreams, Tommy doesn’t even know. All he knows is news that Leila gives his mother over the phone, maybe once every six months and that’s it.

***

All he has left are those memories, locked away, kept safe in a childhood house in the woods. 

Tomorrow, Tommy will move out to follow his own dreams, and no one will ever know about the crazy promise Adam made. 

Tommy’s sure Adam doesn’t even remember. Their lives have taken such different paths that Tommy doesn’t believe they’ll ever cross again. 

He’s made his peace with that. If sometimes he wonders about what could have been, he’ll never let his regrets stop him. 

Because he’s admitted that the idea of making music with Adam was nothing but a childhood dream.


	55. Keeping His Promise (Adam/Tommy, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Tommy
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #109: Memories. Thanks to Leela for the beta.
> 
> This is a sequel to last week drabble-set, Childhood Dreams.

Tommy’s phone rings in the middle of the evening. Since he can hear it but has no idea where it is, he decides that it doesn’t matter. Whoever it is will leave a voicemail and he’ll call them back as soon as he can find his phone.

It would have been a perfect plan if it wasn’t for the fact that his phone’s barely stopped ringing before it starts again, not even thirty seconds later. Grumbling, Tommy has to hunt it down, and he finally finds it lost in his bed.

“You need to turn on your TV right now.”

***

It takes Tommy a second to recognize his cousin’s voice, and even then, all he can produce is a small, “Huh?”

“Come on, Tommy, move faster! Believe me, you want to see this.”

He finally realizes what day of the week it is and tells her, “Forget it. You are not making me watch Idol.”

She huffs. “I’m not asking you to watch the whole thing! Just have a look. Hurry up. You’re going to miss him!”

It takes him so long to answer that she adds, “I promise, if you hang up on me, I’ll only call you again.”

***

With a sigh, he finally turns on his TV. His jaw just about drops to the floor when he hears the name of the next singer: Adam Lambert. 

“Is that your Adam?”

Tommy doesn’t respond. The guy on stage has very little in common with the red-headed, freckled, a little bit overweight friend that Tommy remembers. It’s only at the end of the performance, when they show Adam’s ‘family and friends’ and he recognizes Leila in the audience that he can say, “Yeah. It’s him.”

From that moment onward, his cousin happily sends him links every week to Adam’s performances.

***

In a perfect world, Tommy would send a message to Adam and tell him that he’d seen him on Idol, and they would reconnect that way. 

In this one, if he did, it would look a lot like he’s only doing it because of Adam’s sudden fame. They haven’t spoken in too many years for things to go any other way. 

So Tommy lets it go. He keeps an eye on Adam’s career but doesn’t try to rekindle their friendship. There’s no point. 

Maybe a year later, his friend Liz hooks him up with the singer she plays bass for.

***

Because he’s never paid that much attention to Idol, he has no idea that the Allison who Liz plays for and who’s currently desperate for a guitarist is the same one who finished in fourth place in Adam’s year. 

When he figures things out, they’re about to go on tour, and Allison is opening for Adam. 

They finally meet, but Tommy doesn’t dare say anything, and Adam doesn’t seem to recognize him. It’s not surprising: they were kids the last time they saw each other and they’ve both changed a lot.

If Tommy feels a little disappointed, it’s his problem.

***

And then, maybe a week into the tour, everyone piles up into Adam’s bus for a trip that they all think will be far too long. 

It’s Liz who comes up with the idea for the silly game they play: someone tells only the end of a story, a real story that happened to them. And the others have to come up with the silliest explanation possible. 

Things go smoothly until Adam shows a scar on his forearm. “I got this at ten, falling from a tree. How did that happen?”

Tommy laughs. He remembers that day far too well.

***

Without thinking, he says, “Miller’s dog chased me up a tree. When he finally took his dog away, I couldn’t come down because I was too scared by the height. You climbed your way up to me and got me back on the ground in one piece, but you hurt yourself doing it.”

“That’s a pretty good story,” Allison says as she tries, once again without success, to reach for Liz’s drink. 

Adam, however, is staring at Tommy like he’s seeing him for the first time. “TJ?” At Tommy’s nod, he bursts out, “How the hell didn’t I recognize you?”

***

“Wait, you two know each other?” Liz asks, grabbing her glass to keep it out of Allison’s hands. 

“Yeah,” Tommy replies. “Our families lived on the same street until Adam’s moved away when we were fourteen.” 

They go back to their game, but all along, Tommy can feel Adam’s eyes on him. 

That night, after the show, Adam follows Tommy and says, “I’m going out with Sasha and Terrance. Can we talk when I come back?”

“Sure you won’t be too drunk?” Tommy smirks. “Or too busy?”

Adam laughs but shakes his head. “No. Not tonight.”

“Okay. We can talk.”

***

Later, Tommy climbs onto Adam’s bus and, while the other are rocked to sleep by the bus rolling, they talk until it’s so late that Tommy would almost say it’s early instead. They talk about everything and nothing until they’re both falling asleep on their feet but refusing to head to bed. After all, they have fourteen years to catch up on. 

From there, it’s almost like they never lost contact in the first place. Tommy doesn’t expect it to last, though. He’s sure that after they’re done touring and back home, their friendship will once again be a memory.

***

He wasn’t counting on how stubborn Adam is. They skype at least once every two weeks while Adam is touring Asia and Europe, and when he’s back home, he keeps inviting Tommy pretty much everywhere.

Just as it once was, no matter how much of a hermit Tommy can be, he can never say no to Adam. 

And then, the next fall, Adam calls, and the first words out of his mouth are, “I need a new guitarist.”

Tommy’s heart hammers in his chest, and he can barely keep his voice even to ask, “Why are you telling me this?”

***

He can practically feel Adam’s smile through his voice. “Because you’re more than good enough to take the spot. Because I think you fit with who I have in my band right now. Because I need someone I can trust.” There’s a long silence, then Adam says, “Because I made a promise once. Remember that?”

_…we’ll be on a stage together, and everyone will know our names. I promise you._

Tommy’s breath catches in his throat. All this time, he thought that Adam had forgotten. “I remember.”

“So. Will you do it?”

Just like that, Tommy’s world feels right again.


	56. The Other Guy (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #110: That Look. Thanks to Leela for the preread.

To anyone looking at Tommy, it would seem like all his attention is on Adam.

But all through the night, he can feel the weight of Brian’s eyes on him, making him aware that Brian knows exactly why he’s doing this. By now, they don’t need to exchange a single word to know what the other is thinking.

Tommy shivers every time his gaze meets Brian’s, every time he sees the look he was hoping for on Brian’s face. 

The look he knows by heart and that means both, “I love you” and “I’m gonna fuck you up so bad.”


	57. Thorns (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): Wax Play
> 
> Written for prompt #111: Light. Thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta.

Tommy stares at the candles lighting up the bedroom before he hesitantly says, “It’s pretty.”

Chuckling, Brian wraps his arms around Tommy’s waist. “You could sound more enthusiastic.”

“I’m not good at romance and that kind of shit.”

“So you say,” Brian murmurs. “But even the prettiest roses have thorns. Don’t you know that?”

Tommy’s blood rushes south. He knows that tone of voice all too well. 

“What do you mean?”

“You want a demonstration, boy?”

“Yes. Please.”

For once, Tommy figures it out really fucking fast. All it takes are the first drops of hot wax on his skin.


	58. New Experiences (Adam/Chris Colfer, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Chris Colfer
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #112: Leather. Many thanks to @aislinntlc for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

No matter what people have a tendency to believe about him, Chris isn’t naïve. He’s ready to admit that he was when he started working on Glee. But while four years of working and living in Hollywood didn’t change him that much, it sure made him see the world with whole new eyes. 

However, it’s a testament to how obtuse Chris can be that he only realizes the guy in front of him is flirting with him when Adam steps behind him, wraps a hand around his throat, pulls him back against his body and says, firmly, “He’s with me.”

***

Chris blushes to the very root of his hair while the guy looks from Adam to him and back again, taking in the easy way Chris leans back into Adam’s grip. “And you don’t share.”

“No, I don’t.”

“It’s a damn shame.” 

If possible, Chris’ blush deepens when he feels the guy looking him over from head to toes before he finally leaves them alone. 

“Are you okay?” Adam asks, right in Chris’ ear.

Chris nods. The problem really isn’t that the guy’s attention was making him uneasy. It’s the other way around: he enjoyed it a little too much.

***

He enjoyed it, in the same disconcerting way that he loves the grip Adam has on him, the way Adam’s body is pressed all along his. 

It’s ridiculous. Tonight was supposed to be nothing but a stupid bet. After they filmed that scene dressed up in leather, Chris had to go through enough teasing that, when Adam said that Chris looked exactly like the kind of boys he’d sometimes see in leather bars and Lea had answered that Chris would never go to that kind of place, Chris had sweetly interrupted her with, “You don’t know that. Maybe I would.”

***

Since no one had really believed him, it had turned into a bet. All he had to do was let Adam take him to a leather bar, hang out for a little while and take a picture as proof. Easy, right?

Except for how Chris wasn’t expecting to be this fascinated with everything he’s seen tonight. Or to enjoy the kind of attention that the guy flirting with him earlier was giving him. Or to feel his dick taking so much interest in the way Adam’s still holding him. 

“You sure? You know I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

***

Again, Chris nods.

It doesn’t seem to be enough, because Adam continues, “You seemed to be a bit tongue-tied with that guy. I acted fast. My goal wasn’t to make you uneasy.”

Chris turns his head as much as he can with the grip Adam has on him. “You didn’t make me uncomfortable.”

Arching an eyebrow like he doesn’t believe him, Adam finally releases him. 

Looking Adam in the eyes, Chris repeats, “You didn’t. What made me uneasy is that I wasn’t. If that makes sense.”

Chris tries to look away. Adam stops him with two fingers under his chin.

***

There’s a long silence as Adam stares at Chris, as if Adam’s seeing something in him that Chris himself doesn’t understand yet.

“Yeah, actually. It does.”

Slowly, Adam pushes Chris against the wall and wraps a hand around his throat. Chris is aware that Adam’s giving him the opportunity to stop him if he wants to. 

Instead, he follows the steady pressure of Adam’s fingers on him and tilts his head for a kiss that leaves him light-headed. 

When they separate, they’re both breathing hard, and Adam looks like a cat that got all the cream it could ever want. 

***

“Why don’t we take the stupid picture now and head back to my place? I’d be happy to help you figure out what else you love.”

As he says that, Adam curls a hand around Chris’ dick, making it almost impossible for him to think. 

Almost. Chris still has enough brain cells in working order to understand what Adam’s offering, so very far from everything he’s done before and a lot closer to everything he’s seen tonight that fascinated him so damn much. 

And it’s almost scary how badly he wants to explore it all. 

“I would love that, too.”


	59. To Dream or not to Dream (Brian/Tommy, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Brian/Tommy
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): Dub-con
> 
> Written for prompt #113: Kiss. Many thanks to Leela for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

The dreams always start the same way. When Tommy opens his eyes, he’s naked and tied up in a room he doesn’t recognize. 

He’s on his knees on a bed, with his hands behind his back, and he can feel the heavy weight of an amulet around his neck. He drops his head, tries his hardest to hold in the pained sob that is building up in his throat. Why the hell didn’t it work?

He thought it had. He’s been blissfully devoid of dreams of any kind for so many weeks. He was sure that he was finally free.

***

“Did you miss me, baby?”

A deep breath, another one. It’s only when Tommy has himself under control that he opens his eyes and raises his head, facing his tormentor once again. 

He knows, then, that the amulet has to be working. For the first time, he can see the guy’s face, and without even trying, he can remember his name, even though it usually fades from his memory after every dream. _Brian._

“You can’t be here.”

Brian smiles as he stands and walks toward the bed. “This isn’t your dream. It’s my world. I can do whatever I want.”

***

Tommy’s stomach ties itself into knots. “It’s impossible.” If the amulet were working, this would be his dream, his world that he can modify at will. He shouldn’t still be caught in Brian’s trap. 

“Let me guess.” Sitting on the bed next to Tommy, Brian continues, “You made a new, knowledgeable friend who figured out why you had so much trouble sleeping and who thought he could help. With this.” He points at the amulet.

Tommy nods then he can’t help but ask, “Why isn’t it working?”

“It is. I can’t touch you. I have very little power over you.”

***

It doesn’t make sense. Worst case scenario, there is a possibility that Brian would find a way into Tommy’s dreams, where it will be easy to banish him. Tommy’s learned the spell by heart. 

Yet here he is, captive, once again. 

“I can almost see the wheels turning in your pretty little head.” Tommy hates the pleased edge of Brian’s voice. “Things is, your friend can’t help you much because he has no idea what you are up against.”

Tommy shakes his head. It isn’t true. Adam knew, almost without explanations, like he’s seen this happening to somebody else before.

***

“No?” The mockery in Brian’s tone is like a knife through Tommy’s body. “What did he tell you?”

Tommy doesn’t mean to answer that, but years of habit pull the words out of him anyway. “That if I didn’t stop you, I would be dead within weeks.” 

“And you didn’t tell him that this had been going on for years. So this is meant to protect you from someone who wants to kill you. That never was my intention.”

Tommy’s whole body tenses. “Shut up.”

“Why? I’m telling the truth and you know it. Have I ever lied to you?”

***

Biting his tongue to stop himself from saying anything, Tommy does his best to keep the panic at bay. The strength and confidence he feels during the day, with Adam by his side, are nowhere in sight. 

“I never meant to kill you, baby.” 

The pet name makes Tommy shudder. He hates this, but more than anything, he hates himself for being unable to stop it. 

“And the other reason why this,” Brian points at the amulet again, “isn’t working is because its main source of power is your will. I wouldn’t be here if you didn’t want me here.”

***

Tommy couldn’t even say if the tremor that goes through him is from fear or anger. “That’s not true.” 

Brian’s grin turns downright evil. “If you really wanted to get rid of me, you would have done so years ago, when you first realized your dreams weren’t just dreams. But you’ve never wanted to because you know I haven’t done anything you didn’t want.” 

Tommy wants to deny it, but he can’t. As scared as he was when he first woke up sore, bruised, and with the taste of come in his mouth, he’s never really wanted it to stop. 

***

Brian awoke a craving in him that he had no idea existed. And he soon figured out that anything he could find in real life would never measure up. 

So he never tried to free himself, even though he hated himself for needing something so fucked up and wrong. Because, while Tommy knows it’s wrong, it’s never felt that way to him.

It took Adam to convince him that he deserves something better, something real. But Tommy’s slowly realizing that he’s never really believed what Adam’s been telling him. 

No way is he going to admit it, though. “You’re wrong.”

***

“Am I?” Brian doesn’t sound like he believes him. “Well, then, use the spell your little friend taught you. Banish me. I won’t be able to enter your dreams again.”

Tommy’s left speechless. The spell is on the tip of his tongue but he can’t get it out.

“Go ahead. I won’t try to stop you. If you don’t want what I’m giving you…” Tommy follows Brian’s gaze to the other side of the room, where the toys are laid out. His traitorous dick hardens at the sight, at the memory of what Brian can do with them. “Do it.”

***

Tommy knows the spell by heart – Adam made sure of it – but he can’t bring himself to say it.

“You won’t.”

Gathering the remnants of his courage, Tommy bites out, “I don’t want this. I wouldn’t be here if I had a choice.”

Brian’s chuckle makes Tommy’s whole face heat up in shame.

“Do you really think I give a fuck? By the time I’m done with you, you’ll be begging me for more.” 

Tommy looks away. Fear and desire battle their way through his body. He knows which emotion should win, but that’s so far from what he feels.

***

“But you do have a choice now. I can’t touch you with that thing around your neck. Not unless you do something about it.”

Tommy stares at the bedcovers. The spell is right on the tip of his tongue. He isn’t powerless, but he’s fighting himself every step of the way. 

He hears himself ask, “What?”

“Either you use that little spell of yours, and you’re rid of me… or you kiss me.”

Adam’s last warning dances in Tommy’s head. _You have to be careful. All it takes is a kiss, freely given, while being aware of what you’re doing._

***

They’ve kissed before, but it’s never been like this. Never with Tommy being clear-minded and fully aware of what the consequences will be. 

Tommy waits until he’s sure he’s ready to use the banishing spell before he raises his head again. As soon as he does, though, Brian’s triumphant gaze makes him realize he’ll never be ready. 

“Kiss me.”

_Either you will be dead within a week, or you will be their slave for the rest of your life._ Adam hesitated. _For as long as they decide your life should be._

“Kiss me, baby,” Brian says again. 

And Tommy does.


	60. The Night Before (Tommy/OMC, PG-13)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Tommy/OMC(Nate)
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #114: Tour. If you're wondering about Nate, he's the OMC I introduced in [Late Night Secrets](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1212823). Many thanks to Leela for the beta.

Tommy should be sleeping. He needs all the rest he can get before they leave tomorrow, before home becomes a string of busses and hotel rooms that blur together to the point that Tommy can’t even tell where they are half of the time. 

Instead, his perfectly packed bags seem to be taunting him from their corner of the room and he’s trying his hardest not to squirm in Nate’s embrace. 

“What’s going on?” Nate’s voice is barely over a whisper.

Tommy winces. “I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“I never fell asleep, babe. You just wouldn’t stop moving.”

***

“It’s nothing.”

Nate rolls onto his side, putting just enough distance between them that he can look Tommy in the eyes. “I thought we’d gone through this already. If you don’t want to talk about something, just say so. But don’t pretend you’re okay if you’re not.”

Sighing, Tommy says, “I’m leaving tomorrow.”

Nate frowns. “And?”

There’s a long silence as Tommy tries to figure out how to explain it. In the end, he simply says, “Two months is a very long time.”

“It can be.” Nate still doesn’t seem to understand. “I think I’m gonna need a better explanation.” 

***

“Like I said, it’s nothing.” It comes out a lot harsher than Tommy wanted it to, but he’s aware this is nothing but him being insecure and he really doesn’t want to put that into words. 

“What?” Nate’s voice turns teasing. “Do you want to hear how much I’m going to miss you and that I can’t live without you?”

He bats his eyes and Tommy snorts.

“Don’t fuck with me.” 

“At least you’re smiling now.” Nate follows the line of Tommy’s jaw with his fingers. “And I’ll miss you, but… you know, it’s like when I’m on night shift.”

***

“You have to deal with the fact that I barely feel human half the time.”

More than a little lost, Tommy says, “I don’t give a fuck, and you know it.”

“Yeah, I do. And it’s the same for me. I knew this would be part of the deal from the beginning. I don’t mind.” 

Tommy nods. He wishes it was easier, but he has a hard time believing it. 

Gently, Nate grabs Tommy’s hand. “And just because you’re not with me,” he brings Tommy hand to his chest, right over his heart, “Doesn’t mean I won’t keep you here.”

***

Tommy can’t help but smile. “You’re so cheesy.”

“But that doesn’t make it any less true.” Nate brushes a soft, soft kiss on Tommy’s lips. “Just knowing that you’re out there, doing what you love… it’s enough for me.” 

Somehow, Tommy believes him. In part because it’s so late at night, and in part because he’s aware that Nate would never say anything like that if he didn’t mean it, he feels safe enough to explain. “Sometimes it feels like this, you and me, it’s too good to be true. Like I’ll lose it all if I’m not careful enough.”

***

Nate busses a soft kiss against Tommy’s hair, pulling him closer. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll still be here when you’re done touring.”

Tommy gives a small nod and whispers a “love you” against the skin of Nate’s neck, Nate’s own answer getting lost when Tommy kisses him.

“Besides,” Nate says between kisses, “Imagine how good the sex will be after all that time apart.”

“I don’t know. I think I might need a demonstration.”

The heat in Nate’s smile zips through Tommy and make his toes curl as Nate brings his hands over his head.

“If you say so.”


	61. Respite (Adam/Sauli, G)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Sauli
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #115: Studio. Many thanks to Leela for the beta.   
> I honestly thought I was done with that pairing, but apparently all my muse needed was for them to hang out together in Stockholm and give us 'mystery pictures' :P

By the time Adam gets a second to grab his phone, exhaustion is starting to set in. He’s thinking that when he’s finally done with what currently feels like the longest day of his life, he will only have the strength to collapse into bed. 

He’s so out of it that he almost misses the last text from Sauli. 

_Think you’ll survive?_

He knows, without needing to see Sauli’s face that Sauli’s messing with him. He smiles and texts back, _I swear, they’re trying to work me into the ground!_

He doesn’t have the time to wait for an answer. 

***

When he finally gets another break from the studio, it’s to be greeted by Sauli’s, _Poor baby. Want me to rescue you?_

Adam’s heart twists in his chest. He wants nothing more than to enjoy the easy comfort of the friendship they share. A friendship that he has to admit comes with some pretty awesome benefits. 

_If I was in Helsinki, I would so take you up on that._

It barely takes a minute for Sauli to send, _Didn’t I tell you I’m in Stockholm?_

Adam’s almost left speechless. _What?_

There’s a beat, and Sauli sends, _Let me try again._

***

Adam can already hear impatient voices around him, but all he needs is another minute. He adores what he does for a living, yet it feels great to have a little respite from it all. And Sauli always has a gift for providing him with exactly that. 

_I’m in Stockholm. Do you want me to rescue you?_

Even though he knew it was coming, Adam’s still giddy with excitement. 

_Oh yes. Please._

By the time he’s back in the studio, they’ve agreed on a place and hour to meet, and Adam feels like he could take on the whole world.


	62. Some Things Never Change (Adam, Terrance, PG-13)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam, Terrance (mentions of casual Adam/Terrance, past Adam/Tommy, past Adam/Rufus)
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #001: On the bus (no sex). Many thanks to Leela for the beta.  
> And if you're wondering why I'm suddenly writing Adam again out of the blue, it's thanks to Casey's gentle needling.

Just because Adam has his own bus doesn't mean it stays empty: he would go mad if he was always alone in there. Most of the time, it doesn't feel so very different from his first tour. His band and dancers play pranks on him and pile up on his bus for movie marathons just the same. 

And he's glad not to have to wait for their next hotel night to pick someone up and go further than the bathroom of the bar will allow. 

Besides, whenever he doesn't want to spend the night alone, he only needs to ask. 

***

Everyone's agreed that his bus is much more comfortable than theirs, so they're all very willing to keep him company if he wants them to.

Some nights, he falls asleep to the sound of Ashley pulling soft notes from her bass, almost like a lullaby. Some mornings, he wakes up with Tommy curled in his arms, muttering good-naturedly about not even getting orgasms out of the whole deal, even though they agreed long ago that they were better off as friends. 

And on nights like tonight, he doesn't find what he's looking for at the bar and neither does Terrance. 

***

They end up sprawled on Adam's bed, sharing body heat, more alcohol and a late night joint. 

The bed is a mess. They're both covered in sweat, thanks to the late summer heat, but the last thing Adam wants is to move. With a happy sigh, he rests his head on Terrance's chest, enjoying the feeling of Terrance's gentle fingers moving through his hair. 

"I missed this," he says, so soft he doesn't really mean to be heard. 

Yet he hears Terrance laugh, feels it resonates through Terrance's whole body, low and sweet. "It hasn't been that long, has it?"

***

"Not that." With a smile, Adam opens his eyes and looks up at Terrance. Sometimes, it is about sex between them, but not tonight, and they both know it. " _This._ The busses, the fans, the music... everything."

Terrance shakes his head at him, an amused spark in his eyes. "Weren't you the one who kept telling me that the tour with Queen was the gig of a lifetime?"

"It was." Adam can't deny it. He still has a hard time believing he really was that lucky. "But as amazing as the whole experience was, it was Queen's music, not mine."

***

He would do it again in a heartbeat if he was given the chance, but it really just isn't the same thing. He enjoyed every second of his time on stage with Queen, of course, but even the high of singing some of the classic songs he grew up with to sold-out arenas can't compare to the feeling of sharing his own music with the world again. 

He doesn't have the words to explain it, though. And he doesn't really need to. He and Terrance have known each other long enough that Adam has no doubt that Terrance understands, anyway. 

***

"And I missed my friends, too." Some faces have changed, but the one thing that didn't is that, as much as he can, Adam surrounds himself with people who know him, inside and out. 

There are so many friends he's met over the years, who helped him become the best he could be. Friends that he knows to be talented. So he never hesitates to showcase their talents to the world, now that he has the possibility. 

But Terrance only says, teasing, "I get it. I bet you didn't have someone warming your bed as often when touring with Queen."

***

Adam rolls onto his back, thinking of the long weeks of tour, of Rufus. So sure of himself and his desires that he took Adam completely by surprise. 

"Who says I didn't?" 

Terrance stares at Adam while he puts two and two together. "Rufus?" 

When Adam's only answer is a satisfied smile, Terrance lets out a theatrical gasp. "That tour ended months ago and you never told me? What the fuck, boo?" 

"There wasn't much to tell. It was a tour thing, you know? We had a good time, but it's not like I was expecting it to go anywhere."

***

"So you didn't fall in love with him. That doesn't mean there's nothing to tell." With a smile, Terrance turns onto his side, taking his time to make himself comfortable. "And I know you didn't mean a one-off, 'god we're drunk off our asses so fucking sounds like a good option'. Even though you say there's nothing to tell, I don't believe you." 

Admitting defeat, Adam starts talking. He knows they'll probably be awake for half the night, but he doesn't care one bit. 

The easy complicity of his friendship with Terrance is everything he didn't even realize he's missed.


	63. First Time (Adam/Rufus, R)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing/Characters: Adam/Rufus
> 
> Content(s)/Warning(s): None
> 
> Written for prompt #002: playing with fire. FYI, this happens somewhere around the time of Queen's appearance at the iHeart Radio festival (and around the time when Adam and Rufus were spotted going to a club together).  
> Many thanks to Leela for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are mine.

They've been drinking all evening. It's the only explanation Adam has. No matter how pretty he thinks Rufus is, he never expected the night to end like this. He's the one who offered to let Rufus sleep at his place instead of a hotel, but he'd meant in his guest bedroom. So while he isn't complaining, the fact that they're now lying side by side on his bed has him convinced that someone, somewhere, has to hate him. Having to watch Rufus make himself at home in his bed, being fully aware that it isn't an invitation, is pure torture.

*** 

When Adam can't take it anymore, when he can't think of anything beyond finally being alone in his room, jerking off and getting rid of the frustration that built up all fucking evening, he says, as casually as he can, "You know, if you want to sleep, you'd be a lot more comfortable in my guest bedroom." 

Instead of taking the hint, Rufus looks at him with a teasing smile and says, "I never said I wanted to sleep." Seconds later, his fingers find the side of Adam's neck to pull him in for a kiss, slow, soft, almost chaste. 

*** 

It takes everything Adam has not to take control of that kiss as a wave of lust washes over him. Gently, he pulls away, resting his forehead against Rufus. "God, Rufus, you're drunk." 

"I'm not _that_ drunk." Rufus' breath is a puff of air against Adam's lips, making Adam want to chase after him. "I know what I'm doing." Another kiss, nowhere near as tentative as the first one, and Rufus presses the heel of his hand against Adam's dick. 

Adam shivers and pushes into that touch; yet he says, "You're playing with fire." 

"And why would you say that?" 

*** 

Adam moves, pushing Rufus onto his back, his cock hardening a little more at how easily Rufus goes with it, at the gorgeous sight of Rufus sprawled on his bed with Adam towering over him. "Because you have no idea what I want." 

Rufus' smile seems amused more than anything else. "Dunno, Adam. Seems to me you're always pretty vocal about your preferences." 

He surges up to kiss Adam again, and this time, Adam can't help himself. He fits a hand to Rufus' throat and marvels at the way Rufus opens up for him and allows him to take over.

*** 

When they separate, while he's still trying to catch his breath, Adam says, "I thought you were into girls." 

"Are you doing this on purpose?" Rufus looks like he's restraining himself from rolling his eyes at Adam. "Yes, I am. Doesn't mean I'm not into blokes." 

Adam's traitorous dick twitches, just like it does every fucking time Rufus uses British slang, and Rufus' smile almost makes Adam believe he's aware of that. 

"Doesn't mean I've never taken it up the arse."

Adam sucks in a breath at how hard the image hits him. He wants Rufus so much, it's ridiculous.

*** 

"So drop the protective big brother act. If you're not interested, just say so." The look on Rufus' face is enough for Adam to know he doesn't believe that, at all. "Otherwise, believe me, I know what I'm doing." 

Even though he still feels like he should be saying no, Adam lets all his desire, all his frustration speak for him. "Right now, I'm thinking of tying you to my bed and fucking you so hard you can't walk tomorrow." 

Rufus' breath catches, his face flushes, but Adam has a feeling that it's from desire a lot more than fear.

*** 

"I'm not gonna let you tie me up the first time," Rufus says, and Adam's face heats up because that implies more than once, "but other than that? Do your worst."

With a teasing smile that says he knows exactly what he's doing, Rufus stretches as much as he can with the way Adam's framing his body. He trails a hand down his chest to grab his dick, bringing all of Adam's attention to him as he lets his legs fall apart in the most inviting way. 

Adam can't do anything but stare as Rufus offers himself like a present.

*** 

Adam settles in the space Rufus made for him between his legs. The way Rufus keeps pushing him makes it clear that they both want the same thing.

So even though he feels like he _should_ say no, Adam brings his hand back to Rufus' throat, holding him in place. "You're going to regret that." 

"You think so?" Rufus pushes into the pressure of Adam's hand on his throat, his arms wrapping around Adam's waist and pulling him down until they're flush against each other from chest to toes and Adam can feel him, hard as a rock. "Make me."


End file.
